Silly Sunday Shahrukh Month: A Halloween Rom-Com with Sandra Bullock

Happy Shahrukh Month! And also, Halloween month! And so I have come up with a cute Halloween themed rom-com.

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I really like Sandra Bullock. I think she is nice and charming and has crazy charisma onscreen, and I also think she is age appropriate for SRK. I want them together! I think it would be cute, especially with kids around and Halloween costumes and stuff.

Here’s my plot idea. Shahrukh is a vampire (obviously). But a nice one. He’s just very old and grumpy and tired of people around. He likes to sit at home and watch his old movies and drink his blood smoothies using the supplies he gets from the Halal butchers. He lives in an American suburb in little boring house because everyone leaves you alone in America and he is sick of people.

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Meanwhile, Sandra Bullock is a single Mom of three kids who just moved in down the block. On Halloween, she has a date with a co-worker she’s been flirting with for a long time, feels guilty about leaving the kids, but her friend convinces her she deserves to have a life. She takes the kids out trick or treating early, they ring Shahrukh’s bell, he is grumpy, Sandy tells the kids to wait for her and then gives him a piece of her mind about not being willing to bend a little, and they are just children. She goes off on the date still a little mad at him and it makes Shahrukh think about his dead wife (dead for decades) who he moved to America to forget, and swore never to open his heart again to someone who will die and leave him.

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The three kids, of course, are curious about the weird grumpy guy in the weird house, plus the oldest boy is sure he saw him drinking blood through the window. Once they are left home alone, they sneak next door and start peaking through windows. They are almost convinced he is just a grumpy old man, since all he seems to do is watch TV and drink milkshakes, but then he starts flossing and they see his special teeth. They scream, and Shahrukh catches them.

Meanwhile, on the date, Sandy is out with Arjun Rampal who is very charming and sophisticated and makes her laugh and feel special, but seems almost TOO perfect somehow. Although she is having a wonderful time, and there is a dance number.

Shahrukh finds the kids, starts to yell at them and send them back home, but remembers Sandy’s lecture about participating in the world more, and instead decides he should take them back home and make sure they are settled for the night and safe. He carries the adorable youngest (who is already sleepy) and helps her brush her teeth and go to bed for the night. He makes the two oldest have real dinner instead of just Halloween candy (showing off by making Indian food from scratch). They are beginning to get along when the oldest gets a message on his phone, someone sent him a video of his Mom dancing with Arjun. He is all excited and shows it to Shahrukh who goes “MY GOD!!!!” Because of course, Arjun is a vampire too, but an Evil one.

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Shahrukh and the two oldest go off to save Sandy. Many adventures as they follow her from restaurant to club to Arjun’s apartment. Shahrukh finally saves her by fighting Arjun using his vampire powers, they are old friends, Arjun challenges him that he is weak because he fell in love with a human woman. Shahrukh rescues Sandy, they load the boys into her minivan (which of course she drove to the date) and Shahrukh uses his powers to make them fall asleep. In the front seat, Sandy asks about his wife, and Shahrukh finds himself talking about himself for the first time in ages. He met her decades after becoming a Vampire, he was already a vegetarian vampire, most of them are, Arjun is a bit of a bad boy because he occasionally seduces women and drinks some of their blood. He told her what he was, but she didn’t care. And he learned to cook for her, and they had a little house and a garden, and he had the privilege of nursing her through her final illness. The only thing they missed out on was children, she loved children, the kids from the neighborhood were always coming over, but then they would grow up and move away. Sandy says it was the opposite for her and her husband, all he ever gave her was the kids, she lost herself in being a mother and pretended that was enough to keep her happy, and then when he left her, it was almost a relief. Shahrukh parks the minivan and he and Sandy have A Moment when she takes his hand to comfort him. Until Sandy notices something odd about a light on in the house and Shahrukh realizes ARJUN HAS COME TO THE HOUSE!!!!

Big fight scene again with Shahrukh and Sandy defeating Arjun together and rescuing the little girl. Funny ending when the fight runs out onto the lawn and the whole neighborhood is watching, and assuming it is some kind of Halloween show. Ends with Shahrukh defeating Arjun, and then turning to the crowd and bowing while they applaud.

Next day, Shahrukh wakes up at twilight as usual, gets up to make his morning smoothie, goes to turn on his classic movie channel, and sees a note sitting on the floor in front of the mail slot. Hand drawn dinner invitation from all three kids each with their own little note on it, and Sandy writing on the back “please come. I’m ready to live again, if you are”. Shahrukh smiles, and throws away his blood smoothie and turns off the TV and walks across the yard. End of movie is him being welcomed into the bright loud happy Sandy household and him and Sandy smiling at each other over the heads of her children.

2 thoughts on “Silly Sunday Shahrukh Month: A Halloween Rom-Com with Sandra Bullock

  1. I didn’t know how much I needed this — I love the idea of him learning to cook and starting to cook again for the kids. Like, have a scene where he goes to the grocery store and just frowns at all the things he’s buying because well, he hasn’t tried this out on anyone for fifteen or twenty years gosh he hopes the taste of the ingredients hasn’t changed in all that time…!

    Like

    • Maybe the kids take him to the store and push for frozen dinners and sugar cereals, and he is a little lost, but then finds the fresh produce section and tells them he’s gonna make them a real meal for once.

      On Sun, Oct 18, 2020 at 5:24 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

      >

      Like

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