It’s snowing in Chicago right now and my work has been a series of disasters since 8am, so I need a distraction. Let’s talk SRK.
Gifts! Products he creates for us! I’m gonna give 3 options, you pick which one you want most, or come up with your own alternatives in the comments:
1.Solid high profile crossover role in an intellectual blockbuster from a director like Scorcese, or Christopher Nolan, or the Coen Brothers, or Spike Lee
2. Limited series Netflix family dramedy with himself as the central character
3. A Shahrukh GPS app where all the directions are in his voice
dontcallitbollywood 
Netflix series for sure.
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It would be so great to see him really dig into an interesting character over the course of 6-10 hours.
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Netflix series!
(but also, selfishly, I’d be okay with him not making anything if he wishes me on my birthday (Shahrukh, if you’re reading this, plsssssss))
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I know it’s not as good, but if you tell me your birthday I will wish you!
On Mon, Oct 26, 2020 at 11:57 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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It’s tomorrow!
(also funny story, a friend was trying to remember a holiday and asked me what came right after Halloween and I ended up saying “SRK’s birthday?”
He had to remind me that that is not a national holiday.)
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It’s not a national holiday because it is clearly a Global holiday.
On Mon, Oct 26, 2020 at 12:03 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Dang right it is. As it turns out, he meant Thanksgiving. But I thank the world for SRK all the time, so eh. Potato tomato.
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I want a good, clever, solid hindi movie . A thriller with a good twist, or drama/ family drama. No biopic, no remake, no Rohit Shetty, no Farah Khan and definitely no Aanad L. Rai film (LOL I’m sure there’s no danger of that). A brand new entertaining movie, with a good script and not exaggerated budget.
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Based on Ittefaq and Badla, he seems to have a good eye for thriller scripts. So let’s vote for that!
On Mon, Oct 26, 2020 at 3:21 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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GPS, though I do want Netflix SRK dramedy, but I think he would feel like a box office failure if he did that, so thus GPS. Interesting how much little interest I have in a crossover hit.
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Finally a vote for GPS! It would bring so much joy.
On Mon, Oct 26, 2020 at 3:45 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Going to reverse your first two. I want a family-centered Hindi movie with lots of character complications (rebellious children! brotherly tensions! in laws!) and a crossover ensemble Netflix series. Maybe a Giri/Haji style co-production, but better. We can resurrect our SRK-Antonio Banderas buddy action story idea.
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Oh oh! An Indian/American cross-borders mystery story! Maybe something loosely based on that serial killer who traveled around killing people all over Asia and Europe? Some soulless money oriented guy kills his mistress and steals her money in New York, flees to Goa, and then the New York detective someone-or-other and the Goa detective Shahrukh have to work together to catch him as he keeps slipping around the world trying to escape.
Who was that guy? Does anyone recognize my description? 1970s, had a French-ish name, lots of gorgeous female accomplices?
On Mon, Oct 26, 2020 at 10:06 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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No idea about the murderer, but I’m sold. Right on trend, too. How about Jodie Foster for the American lead?
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Yes! And obviously, no romance at all. They are all middle-aged people with full careers and life experiences who enjoy working together with folks of equal skill.
On Tue, Oct 27, 2020 at 7:20 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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He just gave us a small present – #AskSRK! 🙂
I miss them so much!
And he pretty well confirmed the rumour that he will start shooting soon.
Of your ideas 1 and 3 please. I have often thought how wonderful it would be to have him (virtually) with me in the car. His voice could even back seat drive and I wouldn’t mind.
And I am definitely into a good quality crossover movie where he is the, or one of the, main characters.
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Yes! I woke up in the middle of the AskSRK, it was such a delightful morning treat. He confirmed two things, first that it will be at least a year before his next movie because it has to be shot, then post-production, then the theaters have to open. Although I think he phrased it as more “at least a year” not so much “definitely in a year working on it now”. And he told everyone to stay away from Mannat and not gather in a crowd, so no big public birthday party I guess.
I don’t want him playing some token one scene kind of thing like Amitabh in The Great Gatsby or Anil Kapoor in Mission Impossible, but I would really love to see him interacting with top Hollywood actors in a complicated characters kind of thing.
On Tue, Oct 27, 2020 at 8:39 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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I don’t think SRK will be in Mumbai for his birthday anyway. He’s been in Dubai for over a month and I doubt he’s planning on coming back until he actually has work.
I was hoping for an announcement on his birthday but who knows anymore. The only one that seemed possible was Pathan but Deepika’s name is getting involved in the drug investigation again so I don’t know how likely it is with all the negativity.
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Probably a good idea from a public health side to just not be there too. Hopefully will keep the attempt at crowds lower.
Pathan seemed less possible to me, just because YRF is so perfectionist. If it is just right and ready to go, they will start, but otherwise they will just keep delaying. And they can afford to delay, they have the deep pockets to just keep waiting it out. I’m hoping for a small quick low budget thing that he can do with a skeleton crew and almost no co-stars.
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The serial killer was Charles Sobhraj – creepy!
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Thank you! I knew someone would recognize my description. Anyway, him! As a villain! And then Shahrukh can be the Indian lead investigator and it can be an international show because of all the investigators from other places getting involved. Can you imagine? Hot smart older dude British investigator, hot smart older dude American investigator, hot smart older dude French investigator, and also Shahrukh?
On Tue, Oct 27, 2020 at 8:42 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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No French dude. Make it Jodie Foster, SRK, and Antonio Banderas.
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Ooooo. And then it can be New York, Madrid, and Goa. Or something like that. International resort towns with rich people, he flees from one to the other, and they only manage to catch him by coordinating between the local cops. And it can be a bit of a travelogue too, there’s an episode with all 3 of them in each place in turn with some super cool hotel setting for their conversations.
On Tue, Oct 27, 2020 at 7:28 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Exactly, I think the no romance would be the twist. You see these three together and assume it will turn into a love triangle, and maybe Antonio and SRK even turn on the sexy in some scenes, but actually it’s because they’re competitive and, in the beginning, each convinced that they’re the only one smart enough to solve the case, and don’t want to be saddled with interfering outsiders. They start out trying to get around each other and end up having to respect what each brings. I think Jodie should be the only one with a settled personal life, though. We can make Shah Rukh divorced or separated and Antonio an eternal bachelor. Both lonely so the unexpected friendship means something.
I like this villain because it looks like he wasn’t a pure evil, Silence of the Lambs type, but rather a crook and conman who found he didn’t mind murdering. The real dude looks like an actor who has played a bad guy before, but I can’t place the actor or the movie. Or cast Jim Sarbh, that would be fun.
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Yes! Jodie can have a supportive husband who takes care of the kids while she is traveling and investigating. Shahrukh can be a divorced weekend Dad who brings his kids to at least one of their investigating meetings. And Antonio can have a pleasant no strings dating relationship with a nice woman. They aren’t dysfunctional weird geniuses, they are smart hard working professionals. And that’s what brings them together, they all pick up on their local case and pursue it (even though it’s not dramatic evil like you say, it’s just some rich person being murdered for money) because they are smart and experienced enough to see that there is something unusual about it. And then start to put together that this guy has never been caught because he keeps changing countries and the only way to catch him is to work together.
I think they’d all have to be in vacation spots too, so there’s also that commonality of being the “local” cop in some place with super rich folks in luxury houses and the struggling poorer year round people. Jodie can be in some Florida vacation spot, Antonio is in some Spanish vacation spot, and Shahrukh is in Goa. All of them are underestimated by the rich folks with private security, and the killer himself who sees them as just poor locals, but of course they are the ones who really care and solve the case. I’m thinking they also each have some reason to care that the killer wouldn’t have expected. Like, Jodie’s victim was seemingly a shallow rich woman, but secretly she also gave massive amounts to a cancer charity in honor of her sister. And Shahrukh’s victim was poisoned, and her elderly maid shared the meal and died as well. And Antonio’s victim was a spoiled playboy, but his estranged mother was a good woman who was heartbroken at his death.
On Wed, Oct 28, 2020 at 7:59 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Oh, and the real locations were Thailand, Nepal, Singapore, Malaysia, where he conned European tourists. Amazing filming locations.
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I just want him to go back to work. Any movie of his choice is fine. Just no annoying Ted Talks type of thing.
And if he doesn’t want to act, then at least release his book! He said 3 years ago that he was finished writing it! I can make do with that too.
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Same! Well, except I really did not like Zero and would have preferred he didn’t choose that. But I still liked it more than Ted Talks, so I guess “same”!
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The book would be a nice silver lining from this long break
from performing…if it ever appears.
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Do I have to choose? Because I want all three.
At the very least, I need the GPS. I would get lost on purpose. All. the. time.
After that I just want to see him really really really make it big, like win all two Oscars his first year, another his second, and two more his third kind of big–but with blockbusters or at least audience-favorites that people can’t stop watching. Like you said, the Coen brothers would probably treat him well and he’d give them what they want while they give him what he wants in terms of a director/writer/lead relationship. Imagine him in O Brother Where Art Thou or even in The Big Lebowski.
I’d also love to see what a strong partnership with someone like Jon Favreau or the guy who made all the Oceans 11 movies. Jon Favreau is why Robert Downey Jr. had a 3rd chance at a career (that might be a little mean but…he had Some Problems back in the day) and the Oceans 11 guy does pretty sturdy but popular work.
(Obviously dream-team would be where he and Farah come over together and make it big!)
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Soderbergh! That’s the Ocean’s 11 guy, and he’s got some legit cred in the critical community. He makes stuff that interests him and sometimes it’s arty, and sometimes it’s popular. But it’s always very very well-made. And he does just amazing work with actors, I would love to see him pull something out of Shahrukh.
On Tue, Oct 27, 2020 at 10:23 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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yes! That guy! I didn’t know he’s got actual cred in the critical community, I just know that I’ve always felt like watching his movies is a good time and that his movies age really well for the most part. I also just think that he’d “get” Shahrukh and he’d get how to build a successful ensemble around Shahrukh too.
Gosh now I want this movie so bad, I don’t even care what it’s about.
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His latest movie is Logan Lucky (or Lucky Logan? One way or the other) which went straight to streaming and is really really good. A fun heist movie with losers who come out on top.
On Tue, Oct 27, 2020 at 11:42 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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