Last night, I dreamed that I killed a bunch of kittens because I didn’t take care of them right. Little drowning kittens that I put in a bathtub without realizing the water was running. It’s all FINE!
I think I figured it out! If I do Christmas just PERFECTLY this year, and get everyone in my family the exact right gift, and plan the right activities and surprises, and decorate and clean and cook, and EVERYTHING, then no one will be sad that Grandpa died! It’s the PERFECT PLAN!!!!
Anyway, last night I successfully stayed up until midnight and finished my handmade presents, now I just have to wrap them and add the perfect notes, and then mail them so they will arrive in plenty of time, and then buy a bunch MORE presents to cheer up my parents, and then clean the house, and then make cookies, and then put another silly outfit on Albie Dog, and then NO ONE WILL BE SAD ANY MORE.
Also, the kittens are fine. They were just Dream Kittens. I didn’t do anything bad. I can still fix this.
(why am I blogging this post? I don’t know. Maybe it will help someone else who reads it and thinks “Margaret, you are insane. I will not be insane like that”. Too late for me, obviously! Now I have to go to the library because I feel guilty for disappointing the librarians by not picking up the book I don’t really want any more but I had them put on hold already)
dontcallitbollywood 
And vacuuming . . . have you vacuumed your apartment lately?
(I just wanted to make sure you haven’t run out of things to feel guilty about.)
p.s. – As a wise man once said, “Lighten up!”
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I like the idea of finding more things to feel guilty about! Have you made christmas cards for your neighbors? Have you met your neighbors? Maybe they deserve a whole batch of cookies! What about the mailman, did you make him/her a present? In my kid’s Dick & Jane at Christmas book they make cookies and deliver them to EVERYONE at the post office. I bet you haven’t done that either! How many foster kids have you purchased gifts for? They need love too! Do you volunteer to walk dogs at the shelter? You really should, maybe it would make up for those fantasy kittens you killed. Also you should sweep your walkway AND your neighbors and maybe the whole block. Ta da – bring on the guilt!!
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Yes! You are right! Only, you know what foster kids/refugee children really need? Homemade presents! Like I already made and sent off to my nephew!
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I have had a similar recurring nightmare of killing my pets because I forgot to feed them!!! I used to have it a lot right before we got Theo. But it still creeps up every once in a while. I wonder if this is another DCIB theme. Maybe others have similar nightmares or maybe we are just weird!
I don’t know if it’s time to watch Dear Zindagi for some sage advice from SRK or just drown ourselves in happy sappy Christmas movies! I just finished Christmas Switch 3 and trying to figure out what’s next!
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I love Christmas Switch 3! The Nuns!
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Because of you people I tried watching Christmas Switch – but I didn’t get far. What I saw was cute, a tiny bit dull, and super duper embarrassing. Hi Filmikudhi! How’s it going?
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She’s a baker but she looks just like the princess! It’s a genius movie multiverse idea.
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Hi! Christmas Switch is a very typical, predictable Christmas movie but to me it’s like comfort food!
Everything is a bit of a blur 😄. But we are doing okay. I am very grateful for a very hands on husband. Anyone that says their newborn eats every 2-3 hours is a LIAR!
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Because they eat more? Or less?
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MORE! Lot more!
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Huh! Who knew! Babies are a mystery.
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I was lucky if I got a baby to sleep two hours between feedings. Oh the shock of it, to lose that umbilical cord and feel hunger!
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Haha, baby arrived safe and sound, it doesnt matter what else you do, you already won this Christmas! CONGRATULATIONS!
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Thank you!
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Sorry, Genevieve. My last comment came in as anonymous.
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Gee, it’s almost like you aren’t thinking straight right now….
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Ha! I don’t think I even know what day it is.
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Margaret, you are doing a lot to avoid the sadness. Sadness is an uncomfortable emotion, but is there something else? Are you scared of sadness, are you scared it will never go away? Do you think it would be possible to experience joy without ever experiencing sadness?
When I was in high school I had a dream where I couldn’t stop eating babies. I would be taking care of them and then just couldn’t help myself and bite into their skull. I was a monster. I’ve never forgotten that dream. Thankfully when I told the dream to other people they laughed at it.
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Sadness means loss of control. I hate it! Booo, loss of control! Boooooooo!!!!
Biting into a skull i don’t get, but pretend eating baby feet/legs is irresistible. Especially if you say “num numnum” as you do it.
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Huh, why is sadness the loss of control? Biting into a baby head is SCARY – thus the nightmare. (though apparently delicious in my nightmare)
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Wow. I used to have recurring dreams about lesbian serial killers, but this is hardcore, l like it!
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And this is the perfect place to post about our craziness around the time of year, cos after l wrote something here about doing Christmas perfectly so we can pretend Everything Is Alright, I’ve now decided not to do a ton of the stuff l was going to, and not to worry about it either. I thought my son would be upset, turns out he doesnt mind. Still have to cook my own bodyweight of food on the day, but thats about it. The Mary Poppins route (Practically Perfect in Every Way) only works for Mary P, who is Mysterious, Magic, and not actually nice, most of the time. Of course, if we give it up, not only will everyone be sad, no one will love us either, but them’s the breaks.
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Well, this year I went on the theory that my parents will love me no matter what, so I just have to send presents to everyone else and I can take it easy with them.
On Mon, Dec 13, 2021 at 5:01 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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I am in such unusual company on this blog. Baby-biting, kitten-killing, guilt-glugging. I feel right at home.
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