Sunday WatchAlong: De De Pyaar De! 8am Chicago Time!!!

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Happy Sunday! It’s still chilly in Chicago, I am very happy to have a nice slow morning with Tabu and Ajay.

De De Pyaar De

It’s on Hulu! And Hotstar! And einthusan! So you can find it SOMEWHERE.

At 8am Chicago time, I will put up a “And PLAY” comment and we will all comment along from there!

164 thoughts on “Sunday WatchAlong: De De Pyaar De! 8am Chicago Time!!!”

  2. I could have sworn Tabu saw through the “secretary” line at the first second, but then she seems to actually believe she is the secretary, or is she being passive aggressive?

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    • I think she thinks they are having a relationship and secretary. But she doesn’t expect it to be a full on engagement and in love.

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  3. Genius to cast Tabu in this role. I can accept that Ajay is terrified of her without looking down on him. Because she is TERRIFYING. Easier to just go along with her than say something awkward.

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  4. Correct me if I’m wrong, but the breakup song seems to be the first time we see AYESHA in her boring job rather than the fun one she likes. We don’t see her in those drab clothes or grey environment until they part.

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  6. See, I really like how Ajay is handing being a parent here. He has a right to express an opinion, and he does, but he accepts that it is Tabu who will make the ultimate decision as the primary parent. He’s not coming on all “because I am her Dad, I get to decide everything”, just “because I am her Dad, I am giving in put to you who make the real decision”.

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    • Another subtext I don’t understand, why does he find it so offensive to be considered her brother – they are divorced after all!

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      • I think because of the acceptance that naming a relationship makes it real. So being called her brother makes him her brother which makes their whole marriage into incest.

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      • The 11- year-old, his friend, and the 8 year old are all kinda watching, but without sound because the grandparents are still asleep. And I tried to explain Rakhi to them, but ultimately said I will never completely understand it because I am not Indian. Just as I will never understand why the stereotypes of the muslim cottage renter are supposed to be funny or something.

        I have noticed that comedy is films are the hardest on me. So much lost in translation.

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  13. Ayesha is being really patient with him, I have to say. She could have/should have rightfully left as soon as he called her a secretary.

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  15. I’m at the in-laws meeting scene now and Jimmy and Rakul dropping in there makes the dad in law’s comment about “we could’ve called Buaji to come for this” so much funnier lmao

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  16. On the one hand it was their lies that caused it, but on the other hand, his presense did break up his daughter’s marriage. Super shitty fathering.

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    • Well, she was driven to the edge. And I like that she is acknowledging and taking responsibility for being passive aggressive and making it all his fault until now.

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  20. At the scene where Ishika and her beau and fam are discussing the kids living in and I do like the dynamics going on here. Esp how when he leaves after the FIL’s comment, it’s Ayesha’s one little “secretary” joke that defuses the tension for Ashish and makes him feel good enough to get back to the house.

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  25. Can we have a moment to appreciate the daughter’s storyline too? It’s not the usual “my duaghter needs to be rescued” at all. She’s rescuing herself and controlling her own life, it’s just this last bit that needs her parents to be supportive.

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  26. I like the daughter /fiance reunion, but think it is a bit odd that it is more about the father/daughter relationship than the lovers.

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  29. Really interesting way of handling their night together, right? Tabu has needs, he felt enough guilt in that moment that he comforted her.

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  30. By the way, from the level of comfort his kids have with him, I am assuming he didn’t really “leave”. To me it feels more like there were probably visits and phone calls and stuff, just once his daughter got older it got trickier to have a long distance bond and she started getting really mad at him. I mean, he was sharing a bed with his son! That’s a lot of closeness.

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    • Oh, have you seen Cheeni Kum? Amitabh and Tabu, same plot, but it’s him meeting her family. Very cute, they meet in London and slowly fall in love, and then almost break up after they go back to India and meet her Dad (who is younger than Amitabh’s character).

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  34. Okay, do you see what I mean about Luv Ranjan being a feminist director? His female characters are always 3 dimensional and have voice and agency and usually are the ones driving the plot. Or to put it more simply, he treats women as People. I love his movies for that. Also, great soundtracks.

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      • YES! The one sentence plot of his movies (which is what people usually use to decide not to watch them) sounds misogynistic, but then the way it is presented, the women always have such control that it isn’t at all. “Man torn between ex-wife and hot young girlfriend” sounds so stupid, but if all parts ot the love triangle are equal, it’s interesting.

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  35. So I really liked the movie except for the character that was supposed to be Muslim and therefore laughable? I just don’t get it, and everytime his character was on screen I felt a wrongness. Also the idea that his sex with his wife was just sex is kinda hard for me to come to terms with. It feels like he did in fact cheat on his fiance and instead of “supporting” Tabu he should have said “no”.

    When I first got Hulu I tried to watch this movie – but thought it didn’t have subtitles so gave up during her morning monologue. But because Margaret you said it HAD subtitles I tried HARDER to figure it out – and was able to find the settings last night. So thank you! I’m now hoping to find more fun Indian films on Hulu.

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      • YES! I keep checking, a small proportion have subtitles now, and more are being added slowly. Like, A Gentleman didn’t have theem for over a year and now does. Running Shaadi is another one I keep checking, no joy so far.

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      • it is the subtext I miss – so maybe it wasn’t because he was laughable – but why would being in love with Tabu make him funny? Maybe it could be the way he spoke the words that I wouldn’t pick up because I don’t speak the language. Everytime he was on the screen he was highlighted by being dressed differently from everyone else, and being close to the family but apart, and it was like a big deal of a thing that I couldn’t pick up. I accept that I couldn’t pick it up, there a couple other comedy movies that I just can’t understand.

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  37. Finally finished DDPD! Will go through the rest of what I noticed in points:

    1. I do love that Manju and Ashish separately try to do one last thing for each other before they finalize their divorce. Ashish – the guy so afraid of confrontation that he’ll allow his wife to tie rakhi on him – goes all the way to his daughter’s fiancé’s house to admit his faults as a parent and honestly ask for the groom’s hand in marriage for her. Manju – whose complicated bond with Ashish culminates in a night where she becomes vulnerable with him – is the one who travels to London and brings Ashish’s beloved back. I like how the story is as much about Ashish-and-Manju getting some healthy closure as it is Ashish-and-Ayesha getting a fresh start.

    2. Ashish carrying the groom on his shoulders and his daughter hugging him made me a bit emotional ngl. I did love that without actually saying the words, it’s clear that Ishita sees what a big leap it is for her dad to do what he did and she’s able to finally see that even when he makes a colossal mess of things, he cares.

    3. Highlight of the 2nd Breakup song is Ayesha having a birthday celebration, but breaking down in tears outside her door minutes later. Plus the indications that even though Ashish is grateful for how he has finally found his place back in the family, he still feels so alone and incomplete. Ajay did a great job of expressing that without overdoing it and so did Tabu in the way she shows Manju noticing his pain.

    4. It took me a while to understand the sleeping together scene between Ashish and Manju. But I do think it lies in her wanting to be the one who got what she needed for once rather than the one who answered needs. She wanted to be the vulnerable, protected one for once – Ashish as the man who used to be her husband is the only one who can understand that at the moment and he doesn’t want to reject her wish to be vulnerable. And I think that’s what Manju eventually convinces Ayesha of at the end. That Manju needed a person to shed the responsible image, and Ashish was there to provide that space. I mean I still hate it, but this is what I surmised from Manju’s dialogues both during her I’m Tired monologue and when she talks to Ayesha.

    5. There’s a part of me that likes the second half because it shows us that Ashish wasn’t kidding all those times he tells Ayesha what a mess he was and how he’s failed. Yes Manju is clear that some of the blame for their breakup was dumped on his head by the family because it was convenient to make one person the villain, but you also see that his discomfort with confrontation and his need to be everything to everyone, lands him in precisely the kind of situations where the people he loves feel that he doesn’t care for them. And tbh there are so many times when in trying to fix things at home he leaves Ayesha out, which alienates her.

    6. Ayesha definitely did SO MUCH with the little she got I love her. Ashish has a lot of grovelling to do in the future to make up for that!

    7. Jimmy 💕💕💕

    8. I LOVE how Ashish’s final proposal to Ayesha is a direct mirror to their first breakup conversation! She speaks about how rehashing “the same” with her will tire him and frustrate her, and he points out that that is exactly what he needs – because this time all those things will be with a woman he KNOWS he can’t live without. And it ends with a hint towards meeting her parents!!

    I really enjoyed this watchalong! Even if I was more than a little behind lol.

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    • Yes! That speech from Tabu about how everyone needed to make Ajay into the villain and her into the victim in the divorce was really good. They had to find a way, for the whole family and for each other, to make Ajay into someone reliable who tries and Tabu someone who is allowed to make mistakes and own up to them.
      Yes!!! And that no matter how much she pushes him away, he will stick around and try to help. She said really horrible things to him, and he just accepted and still loved her.
      Agree, I like how you see that Ajay, even when surrounded by family, still needs the woman he loves.
      I think ultimately the movie landed on “Ajay was wrong, but not because he wanted sex.” I found it really interesting, it was treated similar to him eating Tabu’s dal and not Rakul’s. He feels so guilty for leaving her, that he can’t say no. While with Rakul, it’s a healthy relationship, so he can.
      Ajay’s whole London life makes more sense when you see him back home. He doesn’t want serious relationships, he doesn’t want to make friends with people his age who have homes and families, he wants to be in this totally lonely single unattached life because he feels like all his attachments are still back home in India and he messed it up.
      Yes! And the script gave her so much!! So much more than you would expect for her character. Even in the small lines and screentime she got.
      Yes Jimmy!!!
      I also think that second proposal is partly because he feels like he “earned” it now. Like, he has finally resolved his issues with his first family and now he trusts himself to start a second one without messing it up.

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