Weekend WatchAlong: Dear Zindagi! 7am Chicago Time! Woo-hoo!

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Happy Saturday! I got my coffee, I let the dog out, I’m all tucked in for the morning. Who will join me in watching a lovely beachy movie? And if no one shows up by 20 minutes in, I’ll just shut down and watch by myself 🙂

Dear Zindagi

Woo, wise SRK therapy! So excited.

At 7am I’ll put up an “And PLAY” comment and from there we will all comment along. Oh, and if you arrive late, just fast forward to where we are, it will be however many minutes after 7am Chicago time.

137 thoughts on “Weekend WatchAlong: Dear Zindagi! 7am Chicago Time! Woo-hoo!”

  1. Okay, first time I feel sympathy for her Mom. She remembered the favorite, she made it because she knew it was right to make Alia’s favorite along with Kiddo’s, and Alia’s only response is “you just want to make me fat!” because she can’t bring herself to eat her mother’s food even when there is nothing wrong with it.

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    • I think it’s because the mother hasn’t caught up with how Alia has changed and her focusing on what she used to like is sort of infantilizing and disgusting her present self, trying to configure her to be a child again even though she’s now an adult

      Naina

      So frustrated that comments don’t show up properly on the mobile app and I’m not logged into this browser on my phone

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    • I do like that Alia’s parents are not completely evil. Its just they struggle to understand her feelings and thoughts. Like they focus so much on her brother that they often ignore Alia’s needs. They don’t understand she’s not being a brat for no reason and she’s doing it to act out some other problem of hers.

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  4. Alia has such a series of ridiculously handsome men in this film! But hey, why not? If a hero can have a series of ridiculously attractive women, why can’t Alia go from mactor to mactor?

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  5. On the other hand, it’s the first time alia is just going with it and not subconsciosly doing the “good husband” thing. He’s not rich and owning his own restaurant, he’s not her successful boss int he same industry, he’s just fun.

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  7. 100%, Alia has never complained or asked for anything in her relationships up until now. She just crashes and burns them instead of working on them. Oh Alia!

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  10. Once again, Alia kills it in this scene. Her face is so clearly saying “I’ve made a big mistake” even though he is saying everything right.

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  11. See, I have 7! 5 friends and my parents. What does that mean? Do I have to drop 2? Or am I fooling myself about 2 of them? Or am I just really really lucky?

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    • I looked up the study! And it is a real thing. This was a year ago, so I don’t remember the details, but they did do a relationship analysis and it was 5 people.

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  13. Yaaaaaaaaaaaay, Alka!!!! So glad the film didn’t just leave her, or try to change her. She is really really good at her job and likes her job, so of course Fatty snapped her up for work. And also, she was truly friends with Alia along with working for her, so of course they still talk.

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  14. White girl dreads, and bored fire dancers. This is why I don’t want to go to Goa. Or Burning Man in the US. Or the Love Parade in Berlin. all those places.

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  15. SO IMPORTANT! She has to fix her attitude towards romance, and then friendships, and then family. Friendships are a lot closer to the heart of it.

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  16. My friend whose a big cyclist was picking her daughter up from kindergarten on her cargo cycle, and had her baby with her too, and the cycle tire blew. She ended up waiting in a Target parking lot until her husband could come pick them up. But the cool part is, she messaged a cycle person on instagram asking for advice, and that person (who is in a whole other city) hooked her up with a repair person a few blocks away. No real point to this story, I just think it’s cool how people come together and the bikes reminded me.

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  17. So I feel like at this point, her life is temporarily happy, nothing is immediately poking at her. But she still isn’t “balanced”. Until she deals with her parents and her childhood, she will keep coasting and then crashing.

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  19. This actor is so freakin good! And I don’t think he’s been in anything else? I like to think that he’s just a friend of the director who wanted to do one scene for fun and totally crushed it.

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  20. Oh God, this conversation would be painful even if you didn’t have childhood trauma. “Parenting is the worst job! And it never ends!” Sheesh!

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  22. It may just be because I like the actor, but I would kind of love it if she had ended up with the NRI guy. If it turned out that he presented in the worst possible way just as she did because it was a horrible party and a horrible situation, and then they meet later and he’s like “I loved your speech, you are awesome”.

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    • I do like this twist more but also its Aditya Roy Kapur at the end so its ok. It would’ve also made Alia grow more as it shows her giving her parents a chance.

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  24. Just like not forgetting the friends, this movie doesn’t forget the siblings either! First her professional life (just take a break, don’t put so much pressure on yourself) then her romantic (it’s okay to try things, and then decide they don’t work) then her friendships (appreciate what you have, keep your friends close) then her sibling (remember the happy parts of your childhood), and FINALLY her parents.

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  25. Yesterday I watched an interesting documentary about the cult Synanon. Wait for it, it is related! The person making it lived in the cult until she was 6 and remembered it as mostly a happy time. But then she started talking to other kids who grew up in the cult, and learned they were all deeply scarred and miserable because they were dumped in the group children school, not with their parents. She was fine because her Mom was privilaged in the cult and allowed to see her regularly, she never felt abandoned. But these other kids, well into adulthood, were still struggling with feeling safe and loved because they didn’t have parents in their early early childhood. And how now they have their own children and are obsessed with keeping them close and loved and sure of themselves in the world. The really relevant thing to this is that the parents were CONVINCED they had done the right thing, that it was better for their kids to be raised by “experts” then by themselves. And they were still resisting, on camera, the reality of what they had done.

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    • It wasn’t until they were confronted, on camera, with written proof of the abuses at the school, that they let themselves admit they had made a mistake. On the other hand, the kids were doing okay because they’d gone through this process like Alia, and accepted that this was a terrible thing that had happened to them and their parents would maybe never understand it.

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  30. That’s definitely not the first time he’s mentioned to her that their sessions are ending. She’s just chosen not to hear it until now.

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  33. I was just reading about the early Freudians. So many of them had relationships with their patients! Not Freud, he had an incredibly boring lovely simple marriage. But a heck of a lot of the others! It’s not just that the patients fell in love, it’s that the therapists got off on “saving” them and blah blah. So, I guess, if you were in Vienna in the 1890s, DON’T GO TO A THERAPIST! He will cure you, and then draw you intoa weird romantic relationship.

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    • There is a F.Scott Fitzgerald book about it called “Tender is the Night”. It has a similar premise as the whole book is about how falling in love with your patient is not a good idea. Though I dislike the book as it makes the doctor to be the victim.

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  34. Okay, google says 5-6 months after conclusion of treatment for any doctor at all to date a patient, TWO YEARS for a therapist. So in theory, SRK could set a calendar alarm, and reach out to her in exactly two years and suggest coffee. But in the meantime, she is living her life and doing whatever and not thinking about him.

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  38. What do we think, was it a mistake to add that chair squeak moment or not? Because so many people interpret it as saying SRK is in love with Alia, which is definitely not the filmmakers intent. Is it that the filmmaker wanted to say “I give up control on purpose, I will allow you to interpret as you wish”? Or did she just mean to say “he also cared about her as more than a patient, but this movie should have taught you that there are lots of different ways you can love someone”?

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  40. Totally get why Ali came, there were no hard feelings in their break up and I feel like he would go anywhere for free food and drink. But why Sid? Unless she hired him to make the food? And even then, SID! DO BETTER!

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  41. Obviously, nice metaphor that he makes chairs. But also, once again, she’s going for the guy who doesn’t really make sense on paper. Furniture maker, not in film, not impressive, probably not rich. But nice and cute and all those other things.

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  42. I was right! That is exactly what I needed/wanted! I feel all summer and sunshine, adn also loved and accepted, and I am ready to go out and shovel the sidewalk for the FOURTH TIME in 24 hours, and then not go outside again for the rest of the day. Because Shahrukh says I can just stay inside and do puzzles instead of fighting the snow to do weekend chores.

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  44. Lovely! It is way past my bedtime, so I’m going to crawl into bed, but really enjoyed the watch!

    Have a great Saturday inside.

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  45. Hmm. Even after two years, I don’t think SRK and Alia should be friends. He is too much of a giver, he would end up just doing free therapy every time they got together. But maybe if SRK finds a lovely age appropriate partner, he and Alia and his partner and her partner can be couple friends? Or, alternatively, I think he and Alia have more of a shot of making it work romantically than friendship. Because a romantic relationship would automatically be more equal thana friendship, and give Alia the authority to challenge him and force him to open up.

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    • I don’t know about a romantic relationship–it would always have the dynamic of Alia leaning on Shah Rukh to heal her. At the end, she says that she “really likes” him, but is also scared because she won’t have him to help her. Maybe after two years it would be more equal, though.

      Saying goodbye to a therapist is so weird! I ended therapy, at my therapist’s suggestion, about a year ago and I also felt kind of like crying afterward. It’s someone who knows these really intimate things about you, and then you say goodbye and never see them again. Even if you’re not semi-in love with them, it brings all this stuff up, which you would usually share with your therapist, but you don’t have one anymore. (But of course it’s good and healthy).

      Thanks to this watchalong I had the most spectacular dream about Kunal last night–looking like Raghuvendra with his long hair but not acting like him. I recommend watching this movie before bedtime.

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    • my therapist says that the only relationship I can have with her is in the context of therapy. If I stop seeing her at any point of time it can’t convert into any other kind of relationship.

      so… not sure how right Google is about the two year thing

      naina

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  46. it provides many anchors for sight and Garner curiosity – that can put clients into a more regulated state. I’d say it’s a trauma-informed therapy setup

    Naina

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  47. Pingback: Weekend WatchAlong: Expensive Zindagi! 7am Chicago Time! Woo-hoo! – pankajsharmalife

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