4th of July Discussion Post: Export America! What American Movie/Book/TV Show Do You Want to See India Do Their Way? (I vote Queer Eye, Spider-Man, and Nancy Drew)

It’s still hot, I’m getting a heat headache, I’m putting up a lazy discussion post

America! King of sending their culture overseas! But what culture do we want them to send overseas? What do we want to see India take from America and remake?

Spider-Man

Not like literally “spider-man”, but the idea of a middle-class urban teenage boy who is kind of introverted and awkward and uncool suddenly gaining powers, that is great! Plus the whole struggle where his initial human instinct is to use his powers to be cool and make his life better, and then discovering the terrible price of not helping others and switching his whole focus to unselfishness.

Wouldn’t that be cool in India? Average kid in Bombay, living in a small apartment with his aunt, gets a reincarnated spirit of a super cop or something in his body. His first instinct is to just enjoy his new ability to win a fight with the school bullies, and climb a wall to impress the pretty girl and stuff. But then he realizes the “super cop” was his dead uncle, and his aunt talks about how she misses him and how he died and stuff and the Average Kid realizes he owes it to his uncle to be a Hero, not just waste his sacrifice. I WOULD WATCH THAT MOVIE!!!!

When Tobey Maguire was fired as Spider-Man after faking injury to ...
Only real movie Spider-Man

Queer Eye

I’m riding out the heatwave by binging it on Netflix and it is AMAZING. 5 queer guys travel around the heartland of America picking out wonderful giving special people and giving them a full life and body and everything make over. And on the meta-level, the message of the show is about how you can make connections where you wouldn’t believe you could. YES! Let’s EXPORT this!!!!

I don’t think it even has to be consciously “Queer”. In Indian culture, it feels like, there is enough of a divide between the urban upper middle-classes and the rest of the country that it could just be 5 people from Bombay (say, a working single mother, a gay man, a Muslim man in a love marriage with a Hindu woman, a gay woman, and a transexual), who travel around to smaller areas, villages or just smaller cities, and transform lives. Oh OH! Scratch my other plan, 5 HIJRAS! Yes, I want 5 Hijras to travel around India and transform lives while Netflix India films it all and we learn lessons about humanity and loving each other and stuff.

Hijras: India's trans women gain cultural recognition

Nancy Drew

Teenage girl detective! She follows people, she rescues her friends, she puts together clues, she does so much more than just being captured and rescued like all the other teenage girls. Plus, her relationship with her boyfriend takes second place to her relationship with her friends, her father, and her housekeeper/foster mother.

Let’s remake that! Mini-series maybe? I want someone like Alia’s character in SOTY, but she also solves mysteries. She lives in a Hill Station, her Dad is a rockstar lawyer who is often traveling on business, she has a loving Houseman who acts as her foster-father and keeps her grounded and fed and so on. Maybe for a fun twist, her dead Mom was a famous actress, that’s why she is kept safely tucked away in the hill station living an average non-spoiled life. Oh, and she styles herself in imitation of Dead Mom, so lots of cool early 2000s styles. And there is a running mystery of who killed her mother (who also had a habit of solving mysteries). Oh, and she is dating a local boy with two friends, and she has two friends in school (the super girly one and the super butch one). In the end I suppose she solves the mystery of who killed her mother, but it just leads to another mystery for the next season.

Nancy Drew Was Never This Snotty | HPPR

14 thoughts on “4th of July Discussion Post: Export America! What American Movie/Book/TV Show Do You Want to See India Do Their Way? (I vote Queer Eye, Spider-Man, and Nancy Drew)

    • Yes Romy and Michele!!!! The two awkward ducklings who never got married (no greater sin for a woman over 25), having to return to a reunion at their super fancy super judgey boarding school. Sonam and Rhea can produce, they would love it. Sonam and Swara to star? Or is that too sexual?

      For our Queer Eye Hijra remake, should the contestants be thematic too? Like, Hijras fixing Widows? One week they help a 25 year old working Mom who hasn’t gotten over her grief from her husband’s sudden death, the next week they help a 70 year old in a village who feels lost after her son and his kids moved out?

      On Wed, Jul 1, 2020 at 3:41 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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  1. My comment has nothing to do with the Fourth of July. I was just wondering if you’ve heard the news that Alia and Hrithik has been invited to join the Oscars. They will join Amitabh, Aamir, Priyanka. Salman, Irrfan, Aishwariya, Deepika, Shah Rukh, Madhuri. Naseeruddin, Anil, Tabu, and Anupam.

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  2. Spiderman was already made in India. It’s called A Flying Jatt. And I actually like that film! Very flawed but it was the most appealing Tiger’s ever been aside from War.

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    • A Flying Jatt is the BEST!!!! But “still growing up young man gets amazing powers” is a timeless story, we can do it again.

      On Wed, Jul 1, 2020 at 10:12 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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    • Oooo! Or really, just take any teenage royal court and give it the Reign treatment.

      On Wed, Jul 1, 2020 at 11:30 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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      • I would watch this to rage. I LOVE raging and ranting regarding Reign (ooh, alliteration!) and an Ekta Kapoor one would help me release my anger tension.

        Hmmm, when it would be set? Let’s go Mughal and make it Jahanara (because we’re going to piss someone off anyway, if it’s anything like Reign, so let’s make it Jahanara since there’s some precedent in the movie). Or Zeb-un-Nissa, eldest daughter of Aurangzeb, a poet and a romantic. or Gauhar Ara, last daughter of Shah Jahan and about whom we know fairly little.

        The fashions will be OUTRAGEOUS. Let’s put Hindu women in saris that have barely any pallus, open hair for literally everyone, and backless Anarkali suits (maybe some slits as well to show that churidar clad thigh *waggles eyebrows*).

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        • And lots of historically anachronistic behavior! Like, a Palace Prom, and women wearing pants to ride, and stuff like that.

          On Thu, Jul 2, 2020 at 10:42 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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          Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh, I’d definitely be in for Spider-Man movies! The first time I finally made it to my local Bollywood cinema was back when “Krrish” was out, so yeah, super-hero films will work!

    Hey… I never did see the release of the “Hari Puttar” movie that was getting some negative attention from Warner Bros., despite having not much at all to do with their sorta-similar-sounding movie series! I see it was released. Have you seen it?

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