Prepare yourself! This is super tricky and complicated! And also familiar because my Dad is in many ways like All Dads!
Presents we got, presents are great! Problem is, what do we do to celebrate?
Most years on Dad’s birthday me and Mom and Dad and Grandpa go out to a steak house and Grandpa pays, and then we go home and have cake and presents. Occasionally Mom and Dad will have a date night just the two of them instead, sometimes other relatives are around, but the default is Steak House Family Dinner.
This year, NO STEAK HOUSE!!!! And NO GRANDPA!!! I’m still here, but this year it’s not “oh how special, my daughter is here to honor me” but more like “oh, you again? You are here half the time anyway”.
We could do home steak I suppose, but it’s not the same. And it’s not, like, An Event the way going to a fancy restaurant is.
Now, picture your Dad. Likes spending time with family, is uncomfortable being made a fuss over, terrible at planning parties because his wife usually does it. You know, A Dad. What would he like for his birthday, at home, with wife and daughter and dog?
Also, my Dad will be reading the comments here because he is A Dad and obviously obsessively reads his daughter’s blog. Don’t worry about SPOILERS or anything, he gets to read all the ideas and then pick out which one he actually likes, and Mom and I will make it happen (after many years of trying to guess what he would like to do for his birthday, we gave up and now he has to tell us).
Ideas I have considered and rejected:
Charades! But with 3 people? Does that work?
Action movie! But with my Mom sighing and doing embroidery the whole time? It’s not that fun.
He teaches us how to play Bridge! But again, 3 people.
We let him play monopoly with us even though it makes him heartless and competitive. But that might be too much, even on his birthday.
We all sit quietly, including the dog, and finally let him finish explaining the proper way to load a dishwasher/check tire pressure/empty a vacuum/make the legs of a table even/and many other Useful Life Skills.
dontcallitbollywood 
Don’t forget the proper way to clean a stove!
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I already know that! You wipe it down with a damp cloth every night, and then it never needs real cleaning.
On Thu, Nov 12, 2020 at 5:55 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Don’t forget the Bon Ami and also a razor blade for burnt on bits.
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Hmm….how do you feel about watching his favorite movie and letting him talk & interrupt over it to tell you about all his favorite parts?
And for dinner maybe look up a totally new recipe or something and make it together (as long as that won’t cause a fight!). I could also give you my Turbo Ginger Cookie recipe and you can make that!
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Favorite movie is a good idea, except the treat would be more that no one is allowed to talk.and we all take it seriously for once without giggling.
One thing my father and I have in common is that both of us HATE recipes. Inventing a new thing in the kitchen is fun, but following a recipe is boring!
On Thu, Nov 12, 2020 at 8:53 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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The steak house doesn’t have take out?
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If it were my father, we would organize a Zoom with as many family members as we could for half an hour and have everyone make a mocktail and describe it – except it would be a cocktail because my father loves alcohol.
But if your father really loves explaining things as much as you say, you should make videos of him explaining everything. Give him his own YouTube channel. If I have a channel, anyone can have a channel. And I have to say, if I had to check my tire pressure, I would go to youtube because I don’t really know how to do. Youtube has also helped us fix almost all our major appliances at one time or another. I don’t know what broke people did before the internet (maybe they washed their dishes and clothes by hand).
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I have honestly never gone to youtube for a video, because I just call up my Dad and have him tell me what to do. Really the gift to us would be him creating those videos so we would have a reference library.
On Thu, Nov 12, 2020 at 9:08 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Oh yes, this dad YouTube channel should exist!
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Why don’t you go on a fun drive for maybe a few hours, look at pretty sights from the car, chat and listen to good music, pick up snacks from different drive-thrus along the way (if your dad likes that) and then go back home and watch a movie and eat dinner.
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That might be nice! It’s what we usually do on Sundays, but we could make it special-er.
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I’m now picturing your dad as Amitabh, so here goes.
You each choose a favorite dish to order takeout. OK if they’re all from different restaurants. Everyone has to try everyone else’s dish, plus your dad gets to pick dessert too. Video call with sister and family, or they get to participate in dinner remotely. Then you move on to the after dinner tea or beverage of your choice and play Hearts.
Also, maybe everyone wears something nice to make it a special occasion.
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Ooo, I like the idea of playing Hearts! We played Gin Rummy and Uno and Double Solitaire already, but Hearts is fun.
Mom today said she is going to force Dad to pick a cake so she can figure out what ingredients she needs, and if he doesn’t, she will just make what she wants to make. So that’s dessert settled at least. And we could let Dad wear his favorite super falling apart 40 year old sweatshirt without making fun of him, so that would be a fun way to dress up.
On Fri, Nov 13, 2020 at 8:30 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Like this, right?
Ratty sweatshirt allowed as long as it’s topped with a classy scarf.
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Exactly!
On Fri, Nov 13, 2020 at 10:34 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Hmm…an indoor picnic, with a movie as background noise, and decor all over the place? Or at-home karaoke?
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My Dad’s not a Karaoke guy, and decorations depress him (in a “I know I will be the one who has to take them down and put them away later” way). But movie with dinner is probably what we will end up with, even though we do it almost every night anyway. We do it because we like it!
On Fri, Nov 13, 2020 at 10:07 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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I hope he has a great birthday! Enjoy!
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