Take that, Ambanis! Let the wailing and mourning commence, in your hideous mansion built on the ground stolen from orphans!

This was actually very emotional for me. Back in 2004 when I was in college with a bunch of desis, they turned me on to a fairly illegal website called SmashHits that let you listen to any movie song you wanted. I set up playlists and listened to my hearts content.

And then that illegal website was bought by Saavn, which I discovered years later when I was looking for some song and stumbled across it and discovered my account was still active and STILL had my college playlists!!!! Naturally I signed up for Saavn.

And then a few years after that, my job changed and I went to full time tech support with a headset and stuff. But the phone I was using didn’t have any data. So the only way I could listen to my songs in between calls was if I downloaded them over the wi-fi and stored my playlists. So I had to sign up for the pay Saavn subscription, and every morning at the start of my work day I would carefully create and download the perfect playlist for the day, then turn off the wi-fi so I could take calls.

But now I work from home. And my job has changed again so I spend most of my time supervising other people who are answering calls, and not on the phone myself. So no need for my downloaded playlist.

I kept my Saavn account for sentiment, but then I remembered “wait, the Ambanis own it now! It’s JioSaavn! It is very far removed from my beloved SmashHits. They have enough money, I am CANCELING!!!!”

And then I had to untangle this decades long series of logins and related accounts, but I finally did it! I am free from the crushing yoke of the Ambanis! TAKE THAT, Jio!!!! You get no more money from me!!!! Except for my movie tickets, Prime movie rentals, and all the other various things I don’t realize the Ambanis own but I am paying for!

(reminder: they live in the largest private house in the world, which is also hideous, and which they built by paying off an orphanage to move)