Brahmastra! The Hipster Hero Rises!!!

Well, after years and years, we finally have some sort of image out there. And it is not……great.

First thought: Well, these special effects and swirls and stuff are kind of cool, but also not that complicated since it’s all CGI, not CGI mixed with real.

Second thought: OMG, the CGI combined with real is REALLY bad! That flaming trident is not connected to Ranbir’s hand at ALL.

Third thought: Ranbir looks as exhausted and self-pitying and hipster as ever. HE DOESN’T EVEN HAVE A COSTUME?????

So yeah, it’s a superhero movie for people who think Ranbir can’t be any more perfect, and also that his “acting” is more important than decent special effects.

32 thoughts on “Brahmastra! The Hipster Hero Rises!!!

  1. Oh you Ranbir haters! I love a good superhero movie, especially non-american ones. So I’m looking forward to it. Perhaps it will prove you right, but you know, the best super heroes are self loathing, and that could fit Ranbir perfectly! I suspect you will say he is self-pitying, not loathing, but don’t the two usually go hand in hand?

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  2. Literally everyone but me said the same thing you. I think it looks fun but not something super serious as they’re trying to convince. Maybe I had low expectations beforehand that’s why I think it’s quite ok

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    • Rewriting my sentence in proper grammar: Literally everyone but me said the same thing a you. I think it looks fun but not something super serious as they’re trying to convince people. Maybe I had low expectations beforehand that’s why I’m not that disappointed

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  3. Okay, I am going to analyze every minute detail of this movie’s journey…because it’s such a fascinating train wreck. Let’s start with – why are the youtube comments turned off?? Were people making fun of the CGI so they turned it off?

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    • HA! I didn’t even notice that! And I would say, that feels related to the very expensive “moving poster premiere” tickets. Let’s make sure only people who really REALLY like this movie are able to give opinions on the trailer. Like, like it $200 tickets worth.

      On Wed, Dec 15, 2021 at 2:54 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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      • So, since I am obsessed…i went to Twitter to get a glimpse of the chatter and so many comments in Hindi laughing at the tacky CGI…and then you have the Ranbir fans responding like “guys please don’t judge based on one poster…maybe this was made in a hurry….the movie will be amazing!”

        This movie is already bringing me so much entertainment!

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    • YES!!!!!! It is so LAZY!!!!! Lazy creatively, and also lazy like “I’m Ranbir, I hate wearing costumes and hair and make-up, can’t I just wear what I showed up in and get this over with?”

      On Wed, Dec 15, 2021 at 3:07 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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  4. Well, had a quick butchers at the Ranbir posts, oh dear oh my. Just confirmed initial impressions. Thing is, l love proper mythical divine avatar- type stories. But l’ve seen the ‘motion poster’, and this divine incarnation looks…peevish? In David Tennant’s Dr Who it would have been intentional and great, this is more like he went for dominating and impressive and missed horribly. Dont understand the casting? They all saw Bahubaali, right?

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    • Oh! I was watching this trailer with my friend, and I said “look! Ranbir has a superhero movie!” And she went “oh, okay” and wasn’t really interested but watched the trailer. Until at the end she went “wait, RANBIR? That’s RANBIR? I thought you said Ranveer! Why would anyone cast Ranbir in a superhero movie????” Which I think is how we all feel. Ranveer would make so much more sense!

      On Wed, Dec 15, 2021 at 4:16 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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    • In Doctor who I think they were going for a bit of the deconstruction of that idea… especially by the end of Tennant’s run (Waters of Mars!?). Although some of the earlier episodes, like the two parter at the end of S3 and the Christmas special Voyage in Time(? The Kylie Minogue one) played the divine doctor thing straight??

      Also Human Nature/Family of Blood, where Nurse Redfern asks him ‘If you hadn’t chosen this place on a whim, would anyone have died here?” and that’s the kind of nuance I love 😀

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      • I have been waiting and waiting for Ranbir to do a movie deconstructing the “hero” myth. But he never will, because he believes it so strongly about himself.

        On Thu, Dec 16, 2021 at 9:35 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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        • The irony is that deconstructing the hero myth would make people more sympathetic to the character… Because I think it’s easier to relate to someone who tries to be good and fails rather than someone who thinks they’re perfect all the time…

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  5. My sister just sent a group text saying: Does anyone else feel like Bramastra is like the fyre festival of movies. A lot of hype and money gone into it and will never actually be executed upon. And she is so right!!! Are they actually expecting to make a profit from this movie? Also, what are the chances that Ranbir/Alia engagement will be timed around this movie? I like Alia. I really like the Bhatts. Why is she making it so hard for me to root for her? Oh yeah, I know… Ranbir. Obviously, I am still going to watch this movie. I just expect a complete train wreck.

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    • But you SHOULD be able to make it in a hurry!!!!! All you need is literally 5 seconds of usable film, it’s not even a trailer yet. Just throw any old thing into a poster image and call it a day. The fact that this is all they could come up with gives me a very VERY bad feeling about the final film. Here’s the Bahubali 2 motion poster for comparison:

      On Thu, Dec 16, 2021 at 8:25 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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      • Sorry, I mean “all of sudden”. Like nobody was thinking about this movie, and here they are with this, clearly not well made, poster. We have been waiting for ,how long? 4 years? There is no hurry anymore, nobody loses his sleep for this. They could make it better but they chose to release it now. Why? Have somebody heard any gossips about it? I’m curious.

        Also, what marvels me is this huge difference between the money spent and amateurishness of what we got. And I’m not talking only about special effects, but about what e.g Ayan wrote (such a silly description), and other stuff.

        I’ll now have Bale Bale Baahubali in my head for hours 🙂 (I’m not complaining)

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        • Okay, YES! That makes sense!!!! They’ve had a year of lockdown, and this is supposedly their dream project, and this is the best way to present it? There’s just no power to it.

          On Thu, Dec 16, 2021 at 9:07 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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  6. This is such a lackluster poster. Ranbir looks dead behind the eyes. If his stance is supposed to be heroic, the slouch missed the mark completely. And the hype around just releasing a POSTER was ridiculous. Does anyone even know the story yet?? I’m starting to be with you guys in the sense that I just want this movie to release so I can stop hearing about it.

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    • Yes! What are the going to do for the actual trailer if this is what they did just for a poster?

      On Thu, Dec 23, 2021 at 4:08 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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