I just can’t do it. I CAN’T! I refuse to watch any more violent patriotic films. Go somewhere else for a review of Panipat and Tanhaji and probably Sarileru, or else just pretend they don’t exist like I will. I’m going to spend December and January staying home and watching movies from the early 2000s. Join me! Oh, and also Dabangg 3 which has suddenly become the only movie coming to theaters I actually want to watch.
Ready to see bad special effects, derivative characters and plotting, all covered in a slimy shine of jingoism and hatred? I give you the Tanhaji trailer!!!!
Wanna see the same thing but with better production values and a nod towards inclusion with a “Good” Muslim character for 5 seconds, in the midst of an orgy of saffron flags? I give you the “Mard Maratha” from Panipat!
Ready to see the Telugu modern version in which a soldier has to teach civilians how to be good Indians because elected officials can’t be trusted, only men of violence and purity who should take power by force? I give you Mahesh Babu’s new movie Sarileru Neekevvaru!
Now, ready to see a movie filled with happiness and colors and a hero who is flawed and human and a little silly? And a heroine who, like EXISTS ONSCREEN? Dabangg 3 is here to save us all! Who would have thought I would find myself saying that?
So yeah, that’s my next 60 days. I’m seeing Pagalpanti tonight (WOO-HOO!) and maybe Marjaavaan at some point, Moothoon if it ever hits American theaters, and Dabangg 3. The rest of these movies should sink into humiliating losses and failures as audiences walk right past them in order to see Frozen 2 and the new Star Wars film. I curse you, Hindi film industry! I curse you into nothingness! Let India fall and Disney rise!
dontcallitbollywood 
Wow, that’s dire. Not coincidentally I read an article today that there’s a surge in religious minorities from India flying into Mexico and crossing the border into the US to request asylum. It’s like a disease that’s spreading around the world.
Yeesh though, not gonna see Dabangg 3 so I guess it’s time to make a dent in my streaming queue for the next couple of months.
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Frozen 2! The new Star Wars!!! Disney Plus! Or, my 2009 week list of movies, you can catch up on the past. There are so many good things out there in the world, free time is a gift.
Not having to spend 3 hours in a theater once a week really opens up your schedule to other wonderful happy things in life. I’m gonna re-organize my apartment myself. Potentially donating two closets full of craft supplies because I am accepting about myself that I will never do them.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 10:31 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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I don’t know how you and Melanie do it. I’m struggling just to catch up on streaming. Absolutely no way I could catch every new release. Just seeing War with my kid ate up an entire day between the drive, the movie and dinner after.
I don’t care about Hollywood movies anymore. Maybe that will change eventually but right now, literally zero interest in anything that’s coming out.
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I don’t know how I do it either, blogging on top of a full time job, and then driving 40 minutes there and back (at least) any time I see a movie. It will be kind of nice to give myself December off (except for Dabangg 3 and maybe Moothoon).
Have to admit, I am excited about both Frozen 2 and Star Wars The New One. I could be really corny and traditional and go see the new Star Wars with my Dad on Christmas afternoon.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 10:59 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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I’m with you on the whole EPIC HISTORICAL PATRIOTIC DRAMA business that is really, really getting tiring by now. My only hope is Takht which I hope will get made at some point in time in the near future, it is literally the only one I am rooting for in the historical front, the others can just go hide in a corner and think about what they’ve done in the meanwhile.
Can I suggest The Knight Before Christmas if you are in need of some cute, Hallmark Christmas movie by the way of Netflix, which is actually good? Found myself smiling all the way through it, because it’s so adorable and lasts only an hour and a half. Its a nice no-brain needed movie.
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Oh you cheered me right up! I forgot that December is the season of happy holiday romances. Forget movies in theaters, I am staying home and decorating my 6 trees (I bought a new one last week) and watching young woman have magical romances with mythical creatures in a variety of cute settings set to a soundtrack of bad remixes of classic holiday carols. Christmas is always here just when I need it.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 11:05 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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It really is the season of giving; when one doesn’t give then the other will.
Wow 6 trees! That’s amazing! We only have one. The decorating must be wonderful when you have enough decorations to decorate them with! 😀
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I used to have 5 trees in a one room apartment. That was really spectacular! But now it is 6 trees in a 4 room (counting the bathroom). All fake, most of them small. But it’s still extremely festive.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 11:20 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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We also have a fake tree (though we could easily have a real one, they literally sell them near our house when the season starts) which has been with us all over the world since its plastic. Every year is a design choice on what decorations to emphasise and which to leave in the box. At least you can have a theme with every tree.
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Is this your first DCIB Christmas? I usually post a photo of my tree, and I’ll tell you what I do. Since you are supposed to put a “star” on top, I do a little photo of SRK for each one. Conveniently, I have 6 different appropriately sized SRK photos I can use.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 11:48 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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No, I don’t think it is my first Christmas, might be my second, actually. Christmas happens once a year and I guess with all the happenings in the time between the holidays I just forgot about the SRK stars. Sorry about that.
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No worries! I didn’t expect you to remember, I just wanted to make sure you knew I wasn’t spoiling you 🙂 It’s not a surprise that I do SRK trees, I post pictures every year.
Now you have me thinking, is it time to branch (HA!) out? Do a Hrithik tree, a Salman tree, and a Shahrukh tree? Or I suppose a tree with an actual star on it, but that’s boring.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 11:55 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Branching out sound fun! Stars are boring after a while, so no on that. But however you wish to do the trees is absolute fine 🙂
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I could even do a NOT Indian film themed Christmas decoration!!!! But that sounds like madness. Except maybe for Disney or Star Wars. I’m feeling very Disney-y lately. Their brainwashing is working on me.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 12:02 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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They catch you in childhood and never let it go…
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So true! My Mom got me Mickey-Minnie bed sheets when I was 5. Plus I came of age during that 90s golden age of Beauty and the Beast, Lion King, Alladdin.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 12:22 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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I was born in the mid 90s so I got to see the time of the straight to video sequels and the last of the hand drawn animations before it got dormant and Pixar took over for a long time.
My Grandfather was the director of the dubbing for the old classics in the 80s to early 90s where he included my Uncle as well. Beauty and the Beast – the Finnish dub – is basically a family movie in more ways then one because my Grandfather was Maurice and the my Uncle was the Beast while my cousin was Chip. It’s really bizarre…especially since Beauty and the Beast is literally my favourite Disney movie, period.
Also the 90s Finnish dubs are really good. No idea how it sounds to english speaking or for other languages, but they are. Aladdin the Finnish dub got an award or something for the best dub at some point so yay! Now-a-days though the dubs are considered OK at best by those the same age as me, but the fact that they use the same vocal tone (a bit nasal but natural) for almost every heroine is just uninspired.
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This is amazing! And now I am trying to imagine watching a Disney movie and hearing my family voices. I guess if I was little enough when I first watched it, it would just be normal feeling.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 12:59 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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I’m taking the kids to see Frozen 2 tonight. It isn’t really a fair comparison, I’d have to drive 4 hours to see an Indian film. We will be in an urban center for Thanksgiving though, and I just looked to see if any theaters were still playing War. Nope. We could see Panipat, but we aren’t going to.
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And now I am thrown into the same conundrum! My friend just canceled on me and now I don’t have to see Pagalpanti tonight. Should I still go just for fun by myself? Should I stay home? Should I see something else?
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 12:58 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Well, I don’t know what you chose to do, but the kids and I had so much fun watching frozen; it was actually worth the $50 we spent on tickets and popcorn. We can hardly wait for Star Wars.
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I went to Pagalpanti and also had a wonderful time!
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 11:23 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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While the Hindi Historicals seem to be following the same Template, and one Dabang was itself more than what i could endure, not to mention the sequels. Here is an historical violent movie that is not of that template (not even close).
“Mamangam” with Mammooty, Releasing on Dec 12th, apparently being released in Hindi, Tamil & Malayalam. Based on Historical events around 17th century in Kerala. Significant amount of local martial art (Kalari Payattu) on display.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mamangam_(2019_film)
On a side note: Mammootty has previously done a role of a exponent of Kalari Payattu, a classic movie based on folklore (with the movie version being an interpretation of the writer, M.T. Vasudevan Nair ) “Oru Vadakkan Veeragatha”, https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0230597/. This was more drama than action, but it is a classic, and Mammootty won his first National award for best actor in this movie performance.
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And the most important reason to watch Mamangam :
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Thank you!!!! This cheers me up in so many ways.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 1:28 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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I like you plan. I was checking what else hindi cinema offers next month and you’re right – there is nothing interesting (I love Arjun but Panipat doesn’t look exciting). But there will be Happy Hardy and Heer in January and I’m definitely watching it. I knew nothing about this film 1 hour ago but now I saw one song and it blow my mind. Is it that bad on purpose or not? It looks like those movies Emraan Hashmi was doing 15 years ago. Himesh Reshammiya plays two characters and one of them looks like Emraan’s older brother . There are colourful clothes, scottish locations, Warsaw’s Palace of Culture and Science and a lot more. I already love it because unlike those serious saffron films this one brings joy.
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Yaaaaay! A happy Angie movie! And Unni Mukundan shirtless in period clothing in another film. Maybe all of December is just about pleasing you? After Arjun in a period drama ended up being a failure the universe is trying to make it up to you?
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 2:52 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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I’m terrified and also so flipping excited for your Pagalpanti and possible Marjaavaan reviews. I heard both movies were trash. I only ever had interest in Marjaavaan for the music and Sid, but Frozen 2 kicked it out of all my local theaters already. Shame.
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Adding to the annoyance, the person was called Tanaji not Tanhaji! Since I heard about this movie, I kept thinking who is this Tanhaji person? We’d read about Tanaji in school, is this someone else I’ve never heard of? I looked it up, it’s the same person! So Mr. Devgn not only changes his own name but is also renaming a historical figure so as to change its pronunciation! Ugh, I keep finding more reasons to not like this guy!
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Oh my gosh, SO IRRITATING!!!!
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 7:13 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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I read a lot about this movie on twitter and seems there are so many wrong things in it e.g flags. And we only know the trailer so far! So how wrong and bad entire movie will be?
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I just find the traditional Marathi skirts and headscarves combined with the leaping around on ropes hilarious. Surely that isn’t accurate?
On Sat, Nov 23, 2019 at 2:30 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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My theater news is slightly more cheering: Japan continues in its love of all things Rajamouli by releasing Eega in theaters next month! Advertising focus: Just like Bahubali, but bring the kids! That will be next month and I’ll totally be there. Unfortunately no word on either Andhadhun or Gully Boy, both of which are releasing in Japan this year but might not make it to my city.
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Yaaaay, that’s wonderful news! You will love Eega and I can’t wait to get your report on the audience.
On Fri, Nov 22, 2019 at 8:29 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Such mixed feelings about Tanhaji. Great cast and it seems like there’s going to be some focus on familial relationships which I appreciate but everything else??? They just had to make Saif crazy instead of just showing a rajput working for the Mughals just doing his job. Also the actual history surrounding Singahad is actually really interesting and more complex than the whole angle they are presenting (the Adilshahi are important players in the entire conflict) and while it may be less simple to convey I feel like it’s absolutely vital to portray the Mahratha-Mughal wars with complexity and nuance especially with how the concept swarajya is being applied in the current political climate but I guess we can’t have that
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Lol! I am right there with you. Bollywood has gone ape shit for bio pics and historical dramas. I can’t stand it either, they’re all the same! I was so MAD to see that cheating jerk Ajay talked Kajol into being in this ridiculous self indulgent movie. $100 bucks says her role will be of a weepy wife in boring flashback sequences and bad folk dances. Worse than this though is the remake trend. I just about threw up seeing Kartik Aryans creepy mustache and offensive monologue in the Pati Patni aur Woh trailer.
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I’m guessing Kajol will have even less than that, maybe one scene. The trailer didn’t even show her having dialogue, I think.
On Sun, Nov 24, 2019 at 1:32 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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@Sarileru – Though the trailer sounds like that, I expect the movie to be a comedy one in the lines of Dookudu and not in the lines of Allu Arjun’s Naa Peru Surya. All previous movies of the director Anil Ravipudi are comedy movies with some action elements except F2, which is complete comedy.
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I hope so!
On Sun, Nov 24, 2019 at 11:50 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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