Obviously, today is Star Wars day. And also a day when I am super busy at work and can’t really focus. But I can do a “speculative” post without any problems! I get so caught up in my little imaginary worlds, that nothing can shake me. So, let’s do a mini Star Wars fest!
No need to worry about the plot, we just take the original trilogy, smash it into one three hour plus film. Get rid of the sci-fi stuff, because I don’t think that works as well in India. Make it fantastical instead, Bahubali style. Otherwise, same-to-same. Luke is a lost warrior raised on a farm, Leia is his secret sister, Obi Wan Kenobi is his mentor, Han Solo is a smuggler, Darth Vader is evil, plot happens.
Casting, that’s where we can have the debates! And this is such a timeless story, I really feel like it would work in any era. So let’s do it decade by decade!
Luke: Dilip Kumar (has a kind of innocent demeanor, good with a sword)
Leia: Nargis (Classy, confident, powerful)
Han Solo: Dev Anand (cool kind of bad boy vibe)
OR Raj Kapoor (crazy chemistry with Nargis, could also be bad when he wanted to, their swimsuit scene in Awara is basically a Leia-Han scene already)
Obi Wan: Ashok Kumar (older, wise, had a real life mentor relationship with Dilip)
Darth Vader: Prithviraj Kapoor (Screen presence like you wouldn’t believe! Plus, very tall. And a great voice)
Luke: Rajesh Khanna (Young Rajesh Khanna would make the sexiest innocent farm boy ever!)
Leia: Sharmila Tagore (Confident, cool, able to give back as much as she got)
Han Solo: Shammi Kapoor (he just doesn’t care about anything!)
Obi Wan: Ashok Kumar (still totally able to pull it off well into the 60s)
Darth Vader: Pran (he can play anything)
Luke: Amitabh (not even going to bother explaining, this casting is so clearly right)
Leia: Hema Malini (ditto)
Han Solo: Dharmendra (ditto)
Obi Wan: Pran! (he can still play anything)
Darth Vader: Sanjeev Kumar (he can play anything too)
Luke: Anil Kapoor (It’s Anil Kapoor! How could you not?)
Leia: Dimple (Mature, confident, very cool)
Han Solo: Sunny Deol (cool, strong, great chemistry with Dimple)
Obi Wan: Shammi Kapoor (doing character roles in his older years, couldn’t move very well, but still had such great presence!)
Darth Vader: Danny Danzongpa (it’s the 80s, it’s always Danny Danzongpa)
Luke: Salman Khan (Salman in Maine Pyar Kiya mode is a perfect Luke)
Leia: Sridevi (I was going to put her in the 80s until I remembered Dimple, but she was still acting in the 90s, so this works)
Han Solo: Anil Kapoor (I’m open to suggestions, but he had such great chemistry with Sridevi, and he was kind of in a Tapoori bad boy mode in the 90s)
Obi Wan: Anupum Kher! The perfect Obi Wan!
Darth Vader: Amrish Puri! The perfect Darth Vader! This may be my favorite cast
Leia: Priety Zinta
Han Solo: Shahrukh
Obi Wan: Amitabh
Darth Vader: Amitabh in a clever double role!
And finally, 2010s:
Luke: Ranbir Kapoor
Leia: Kareena Kapoor (clever, right?)
Han Solo: Ranveer Singh maybe?
Obi Wan: Shahrukh
Darth Vader: Amitabh!
So, comments? Questions? Disagreements? Complaints that this is a very silly and lightweight post? I welcome them all!