This is a very old post which hopefully most of you have forgotten about. I forgot about it myself, and then I just now stumbled on it and it delighted me.
A couple years ago, my sister and I were riding in the car together singing in an incredibly unmelodious way along with the songs on my ipod. And suddenly she started laughing so hard she couldn’t sing any more. Which confused me, until she explained that it’s “Tere Bina beswaadi” as in, “Without You [life/nights] are tasteless”. Not, in fact, what I was singing, “tere bina basmati”, as in, “without you, [life/nights] are riceless”.
(Also, I guess, Amitabh-less, since he only appears when you have rice to call him forth.)
(Riceless!!!!! See, that’s why she is so sad and skinny. Also, it’s because in the south they eat rice not bread, a little touch showing Ratnam’s connection to his Tamil roots. Or, not)
Due to my complete lack of language abilities, and too much thinking of food words, this is not the only song with which I have similar issues. Not like I ACTUALLY think they are singing about food, but my ear doesn’t hear the difference between the real words of the song and the food word, and so the version I sing just has the food word in it. Which is why I never sing in public. Because people will laugh.
For instance, have you ever wanted a song about how very very much you love the luncheon meat Salami?
Let me give you “Salami Ishq”!
You know stuffed grape leaves? That delicious Mediterranean treat called “dolma”? Look! Shahrukh did a whole song about them!
Okay, technically “Dholna” not “dolma”, but it still makes me run to the store at the end of my street to buy grape leaves whenever I hear it.
And of course there is Aamir’s odd to everyone’s favorite dessert treat/method of alcohol shots, Jello.
Clearly, the secret power behind their resistance was a strange wobbly fruit flavored thing.
And it’s not just non-Indian foods either! Like, you know that song from Ghajini about how Jiah Khan just really really wants a sweet?
Here, Jiah, have a Ladoo! You know you want it
And finally, Reflects on Life suggested that we add Ranbir’s painful lament about his chickpeas
dontcallitbollywood 
Okay, so legit for a long time I thought Channa Mereya WAS about chickpeas and I didn’t get what he was going on about. THEN somebody explained to me that ‘channa’ meant ‘moon’ in Urdu and a part of me crumbled. I’m pretty sure it was the part of me that knew that my grandfather was fluent in five languages…including Urdu.
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I wonder if at some point someone thought chickpeas looked like little moons? There must be a connection somewhere!
On Tue, Jun 16, 2020 at 9:22 PM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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ooh, I just remembered another song that’s basically all about Salami!
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HA! Now I’m picturing the same dance number, only they are all holding enormous salamis in one hand.
On Wed, Jun 17, 2020 at 7:57 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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If so, it’s super romantic and also makes me feel like I should be full a lot faster when I eat them.
If however, it was the other way around, where a person looked at the moon and thought it looked like a giant chickpea…
Yeah. No.
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That’s it, from now on when I look up at the night sky I will just see a giant chickpea.
On Wed, Jun 17, 2020 at 8:17 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Man, wouldn’t it be great if he really was singing about chickpeas.
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I feel like I could understand that song on a far deeper really level if he was. Who has not felt that way about chickpeas?
On Wed, Jun 17, 2020 at 1:05 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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They’re a great food and you’re right, we’ve all had feelings about chickpeas.
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Probably more people have had feelings about chickpeas than have felt unrequited love for someone marrying someone else. Karan really missed out on an opportunity to create a universal song moment.
On Wed, Jun 17, 2020 at 9:35 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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lol he should have listened to You Are My Chicken Fry and learnt something.
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This is a bit blasphemous, but I sometimes hear this other Karan song as “Oh Sandwich”. Which would speak deeply to the immigrant experience and learning American norms, wouldn’t it?
On Wed, Jun 17, 2020 at 9:43 AM dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Should have shared a sandwich in the song. It could be a romantic food, why not?
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Our boy is starting to sing along to the songs he knows from daycare. Or, more often, he will say a line and expect me to sing. Anyways, there is this one nonsense song that goes “aravi, aravi”. He always sings “salami, salami”. His first mondegreen, yay! I’m pretty sure he thinks it’s about eating, too.
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And an indication that he knows the difference between nonsense and real words! Very intelligent.
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