It’s grey and getting colder outside, but inside things are HEATING UP. We are watching the Chippendales movie!
The link below is the best link I can find on youtube for “Tall Dark and Handsome”. We are going to watch it together starting at 3pm and have brilliant critical analytical commentary.
At 3pm Chicago time, I will put up an “And PLAY” comment and then we will all comment along from there!
And if we like it enough, and if people join late, we will just start playing it over again at 4:10pm.
dontcallitbollywood 
I’m here, is it just us being trash queens tonight?
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If so, I’m thrilled!
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And PLAY
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It’s Val.
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Oooo, opening with text on a black screen! It’s ARTY!
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Flossing in the car!!!!! And the “my boobs aren’t even”! I’m already feeling so female gaze-y.
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My boobs aren’t even was some hard hitting realism I wasn’t ready for. Was the driver a lady???
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Yes!
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That was kind of sexy although I don’t think they’ll be leaning into that here
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Steve Banerjee! Desi producers represent!!!! I like that a desi produced this, and also Lincoln.
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What IS this WHAT
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Ooooo, Dancing!!!! It’s just like one of our normal movies!
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The kids were outside earlier and I watche the first 20 minutes until they came back in. And I CANNOT stand the woman kissing the man’s ass. It just makes me feel gross and icky. As soon as the kids came back inside I turned it off. I MUST protect them from male objectification? I don’t know it just feels wrong.
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Honestly nobody should be exposed to this but I’m having a great time
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Do you think they are really doing their own singing? Or is the microphone just a prop?
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All they can do is twirl. TWIRL.
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The opening dancers are pretty bad at dancing – but then the next crew is better.
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Yuch, I don’t like th ebleached blonde man.
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But you like all the Weird Al afros?
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Yes. I just cna’t with bleached hair.
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It’s weird because I quite enjoy looking at these guys but would never be interested in them in real life. They’re all kind of wrong somehow.
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They don’t look like they are enjoying themselves.
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I don’t know if it’s that, I enjoy it when Govinda is miserable. They’re miserable in the wrong way?
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Based on the interviews I saw of the dancers, they were actually enjoying it. But maybe they weren’t enjoying making this movie.
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None of these dopey dudes are giving me good face in the close ups. Which makes sense if they are more live performers and less camera.
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So far this is more dancing with an open shirt than stripping. I feel tricked.
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If I seeONE MORE TWIRL MY GOD
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Here we go
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Oh oh! I think this is the beginning of the music video!!!!! Fantasy song!
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The one where he sings about being more than a two-dimensional photo but barely ever moves his face and wears nude underwear that is highly disconcerting.
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I do NOT like the lady legs coming down between his legs, that’s weird.
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So much about it is weird and yet is it that much different from like Shut Up and Bounce??? How come it reads so weird?
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Who puts on a shirt first and then pants? And no underwear at all?
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THe no underwear is wrong. I preschool dad once told me that he doesn’t wear underwear and I have tried not to think about it ever since. I don’t think he washes his pants often.
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80s/early 90s make-up is almost Kabuki sometimes, with the white foundation and perfect lips and all.
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OMG, it’s Judy Landers! I don’t know who that is.
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It’s the actress they hired for the next song video!
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Valerie, stop fantasising while staring at your friend and this guy
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Yaaaaaaaaaaaaay, it’s another music video! Is his penis talking on the phone?
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YES IT IS
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Oh wow this song was made for me personally
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I think this movie thinks I like men’s butts more than I like mens butts. Like, there’s more focus on that one area than any other body part.
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It was a whole thing in the late 80s/early 90s.
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Musically, I have to say it’s not as catchy as the first song.
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But the cucumber and carrot buffet!
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OMG that cucumber!
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This choreography though! This is legit production values!
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Finally, some stripping! It’s about time.
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Finally some stripping
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Jinx!
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That underwear is dorky
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Because it needs to strip more!
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The MC is GREAT. Very good at his job.
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Genuinely fancy the MC most so far so he’s probably gay
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I’ve lost track, which one is getting married tomorrow? Is it Val?
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Okay, so Val is the redhead fun one. The other one is the bride.
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Woot! Feminism! Equality in strip shows!
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Wait, so are women actually stroking the dancer’s genitals? Did I see that right?
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Yes, but then tipping him
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Charlie Crusher?????
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You do not have all types of guys, look at them
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It’s very VERY true. And the 90s/80s had a super specific odd look to it.
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Spouse just walked in and said there is nothing like a perm and no shirt!
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Okay, where are you? I want to go back and join you
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Oooo, Judy Landers sister was on Dallas!!!!
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Karate/Yogi fantasy! See, they do have all types.
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oh god what is this how is this sexy
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Shouldn’t his choreography be Karate themed? Instead of just more butt stuff?
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I’m not too impressed with the karate dance pre stripping.
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Also, shouldn’t they be undressing each other?
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Exactly
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I see they bought the dork underwear in bulk.
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Michelle, god you can’t do anything
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Yaaaaay, our three heroines!
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This MC is working harder than anyone else, he better be well paid.
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I love the MC he’s cute
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SONG! OMG, I am so excited.
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Oh my god her GIANT drink
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They do a lot of straight led bending over in this movie. Yes, I am going to continue to call it a movie. It has a PLOT! And characters with names!
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straight leg
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Listen if Arson Mom is a movie, this is a movie
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Now I’m getting shades of Dard-E-Disco. Do you think Farah watched this for inspiration?
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I’m kind of into this song (?), as long as they don’t show this guy’s face
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It’s an instrumental peice. Contemplative. Nature scenes.
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Was he shaking his sunlotion bottle in an imitation of masturbation? “It puts the lotion on it’s skin or it gets the hose again.” – hubby
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Oh oh! Genevieve! You are abotu to see the Motorcycle/chair song!
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Wait, Chippendales dancers are like magic genies? Of sex?
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Woooo, Maureen!
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