Saturday Classics: Silsila! For Holi!

Happy Saturday!  I’m on vacation, so I missed yesterday’s Friday classic post.  And posts will be a bit sparse for the next few days.  But I’m gonna make up for it by doing a stone-cold classic, which is also holiday appropriate, for the random one-off Saturday Classics post.

Silsila is such a remarkable movie.  It is peak Yash Chopra.  Everything he does well, done to perfection, and nothing he does poorly included.  The use of stars, the use of mise en scene, of songs, of costumes, it’s all perfect.  And it is also a perfect investigation of the sort of hard to define and hard to limit relationships that Yashji does so well.

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(Amitabh and Jaya and Rekha are all related and kind of blur together)

Yashji’s weakness was when he tried to simplify things.  Jab Tak Hain Jaan, a love that will not die or progress or have any complicated emotional layers to it, that’s a weakness.  Chandni isn’t as good as Lamhe (yes, I said it!) because Chandni is about a young woman falling in love with a young man and that’s it, while Lamhe is about first love and later love and evolving love.

Silsila, meanwhile, is about the most complicated relationship patterns you can imagine.  Love in all its shades and changes.  People dealing with impossible emotional puzzles.  And dealing with them in the way they happen in real life, not in big confrontations and speeches, but little every day moments, hidden heart breaks, unspoken words.

Because it is about real life, it also means no one in this narrative is entirely blameless.  All 4 people in this story, 5 if you count Shashi, are culpable in what happens.  The title means “chain” or “connection” and that is what it is about, how every little thing we do can effect someone else.

This film isn’t just the purest artistic expression of Yash Chopra, it’s the purest philosophical expression of Yash Chopra.  After his death, story after story came out of how kind he was, how caring, how aware of other people’s feelings and how to make them feel better.  And that’s what this story is about.  How important it is, above all, to do what will cause the least pain to others.  Not any abstract morality or social rules, but the individual people around you and what will hurt them.

Which is, of course, why it is so odd that Yashji had the particular caste he did for this film.  Supposedly, according to Yashji himself in his final interview, it was Amitabh who did it.  Yashji came to him with the story, prepared to cast Smita Patil and Parveen Babi, and Amitabh suggested “what about Rekha and Jaya?”  Yashji didn’t think he could get them, but Amitabh said he would take care of it, they would both agree.

So, if we are taking this film as a statement of what has the most value in the world, then Amitabh is the one who failed.  No matter what you believe was really happening or had happened between the three of them, it is certainly clear that at that point in time Jaya very much did not want to work with, or spend time with, Rekha.

(Although she also got to spend time with Shashi, I am sure that helped.  Because Shashi was the best!)

But even if the real life situation was a lot of pain, I think I am still going to say that it was worth it.  I’m not usually of the opinion that art justifies pain, but in this case the art is so wonderful and perfect, and the real life pain was (thankfully) a contained limited experience, so I think it was.

Seems silly to put up a SPOILER bar, even if you’ve never seen it most people know the basics of the Silsila plot, but just in case here it is.

 

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It’s a simple plot.  Rekha and Amitabh are in love, Shashi (Amitabh’s brother) and Jaya are in love.  But then Shashi dies, Jaya is pregnant, Amitabh breaks it off with Rekha with no explanation and marries Jaya to save her from shame.  Months later, Jaya loses the baby in an accident, and coincidentally her doctor is Rekha’s new husband, Sanjeev Kumar.  A perfectly nice man who is happy with his wife, although aware that she is not in love with him.  Amitabh chases Rekha, and convinces her to start seeing him secretly.  At the same time, he and Jaya are getting closer and closer.  Jaya begins to see what is happening between him and Rekha but doesn’t acknowledge it, and Sanjeev does as well.  Finally, Amitabh and Rekha run off together to visit old friends, who criticize them for walking out on their marriages.  They return, and in a sudden flurry of events, Sanjeev is on a plane that crashes, Amitabh rushes in to save him, Jaya faints, and Amitabh learns Jaya is pregnant again and tearfully unites with her (finally) while Rekha has gone off with Sanjeev.

So, it’s a story of an affair.  With the slight twist that the couple having an affair were in love before their respective marriages.  And it ends with marriage being reaffirmed (as almost always).  But it’s the way it is done that makes it so special.

Going all the way back to the first meeting between Jaya and Amitabh and Rekha and Amitabh.  Jaya is Shashi’s girl, Amitabh is delighted to meet her and flirt with her and joke with her, he becomes her friend-by-marriage, sort of, and they get along really well right away.  Amitabh gets drunk, Jaya smiles at him, it’s all very comfortable and familiar and happy.  In contrast, Rekha is dancing at a wedding and Amitabh falls in love at first sight, while she shyly retreats, he follows her.  And then writes her poetry and sends her roses.

Right away there is a contrast of choices.  Jaya is the easy comfortable happy funny fun choice.  Rekha is the stunningly beautiful romantic overwhelming choice.

Well, not “choice”.  That’s kind of the point of the film, Amitabh never had a chance to make that choice.  He knew two women, met them around the same time.  Jaya was never on the table for him, because she belonged to Shashi.  Rekha was the one for him.  But then Shashi dies, and suddenly Jaya is the only choice, he HAS to marry her.

The rest of the film is about Amitabh working this through, finding a way to make that choice,  He tries to rewind, to go back to Rekha, but he doesn’t let Jaya go.  It’s not just that he doesn’t break the marriage, he is clearly all in this marriage.  We see it in little moments, casually changing clothes in the shared bedroom, sitting in the tub while she washes her face in the bathroom, making plans to go to dinner together.  They are married in every way, not at once, but in tiny little hints that slowly increase through out the film as we see that their relationship is progressing.

Amitabh picking Jaya at the end and letting Rekha go isn’t because his relationship with Rekha was always doomed, or because he was in love with Jaya all along.  If Shashi hadn’t died, Amitabh might have married Rekha and been very happy as they slowly built a life together.  And he certainly wouldn’t have started an affair with Jaya because he was so overwhelmingly drawn to her.  But when Jaya was an option, not with Shashi.  And when he spent time with her and slowly built a life with her, then there was nothing in his shallow flush of passion with Rekha that he would pick over that.

Jaya, on the other hand, always felt like she had a choice.  She could choose to mourn Shashi her whole life, or she could let him go and fall in love with the man who she married.  And she chose to fall in love.  And she chose to tell Amitabh she loved him, truly.  And most importantly, she chose to let him choose.  Kept it from him that she was pregnant because she wanted him to choose herself and their marriage for herself, not because he felt forced into it.

And then there’s Rekha.  Like Amitabh, she never really had a choice.  She was in love, and then just as suddenly he stopped loving her and she was alone.  She was married off to a nice enough man, but she held herself off from him, never revealing how she felt because that had only brought her heartbreak.  Amitabh breaks down her barriers again, only to reveal that (like Amitabh) she had learned to love her spouse, and now she was willing to show that love.

It sounds terribly regressive to say that love will always come after marriage.  But, in some ways, it is true.  There is an intimacy built in to having a life together, a bond will almost always form.  It may not be the strongest bond in your life, you may be able to fight against it and form something stronger, but it also cannot be written off as though it never happened.  You can’t go back in life, only forward.

This is the complicated situation they all find themselves in.  But on top of this situation, in which their are no easy answers and no one is living the life they really wanted (even Sanjeev Kumar would prefer a wife that he knew loved him), there is the question of how they handle the situation.  And that is where the judgements happen.  Amitabh and Rekha do not handle themselves well.  Especially Amitabh.

Over and over again, they take risks of revealing their relationship.  Their still present love for each other, perhaps even acting on that love, could be forgiven and understood, but allowing that love to be visible, to humiliate and break the hearts of their spouses, that is not forgivable.  That is wrong, because it causes harm to others that could have been avoid.

On the other hand, Jaya’s choice to cover for Amitabh to protect his public pride, that is a remarkable sacrifice, giving up her personal happiness for the sake of saving others from humiliation (her husband, Rekha, even Sanjeev Kumar).  Sanjeev’s choice to acknowledge and give tribute to her sacrifices is remarkable as well, taking a moment from his own pain to see hers and understand her struggles.

In the end, that is why Amitabh has to rescue Sanjeev.  Because he has been selfish, and uncaring, and damaging.  And he needs to make up for that by being as unselfish and sacrificing and caring as he can be.  Followed by rushing home to his wife, to finally admit that he loves her and should make her the first priority of his life (instead of only caring about himself).

 

Now, of course, the question is whether you can ever forgive Amitabh?  Either the character, who got drunk and danced with his mistress without caring how it looked or made his wife feel.  Or the man in real life who suggested his rumored mistress to play his mistress, his wife to play his wife, and then wrote and sang this song himself.

(Forgiving Rekha is a separate matter.  She had A LOT in her life, check out my relevant post here)

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25 thoughts on “Saturday Classics: Silsila! For Holi!

  1. Silsila was a double treat to the audience.Not only did they get to see the characters in the story but they also got a rare chance to see the dynamics of the relationship between the real stars firsthand.Very rarely, the real relationship between the stars translates into their characters and gives that extra dimension to the performance.Not always(Kareena/Shahid or kareena/Saif or any number of off screen couples who were involved in real life).When Arjun Kapoor and Ranveer Singh played friends in Gunday some of their offscreen friendship translated into offscreen as well.Similarly Mahesh Bhatt said (about Naam) that the offscreen chemistry between Sanjay Dutt and Kumar Gaurav -the former erratic and passionate and the latter calm,steadfast and more successful (at the time) translated into their chemistry/characters on screen as well.
    Yash Chopra must have believed that Amitabh can bring justice to these unsympathetic selfish characters.That must be why he handed over Kabhie Kabhie and then Silsila to him.

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    • I see Yash Chopra’s casting of Amitabh in these roles as him confronting the patriarchy and how much we are willing to forgive it. Amitabh is always the hero, and he plays these roles in a “heroic” way, confident and noble and silent, but if you look at what he is actually doing, it’s despicable. It’s the opposite of Deewar, where Amitabh was seemingly not the hero, but if you look at what he’s actually doing, it is heroic.

      On Sun, Mar 4, 2018 at 4:42 AM, dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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  2. Well — I just had an insight, one which I’ve never seen in any discussion of this film that I have come across.

    I’ve never seen the film, but have read several discussions of it, and slowly various details of the plot emerged through those. So I think I knew that Jaya’s character was in love with Shashi’s. I might even have known that she became pregnant by him before they could marry. But I don’t think I ever knew that Shashi and Amitabh were brothers. When I read that in your spoilers section, it was a wallop. My reaction was, “Whoa! That COMPLETELY changes the dynamics and implications of the story!” Why has no one tied the event of Amitabh marrying Jaya with the North Indian practice of a man marrying his brother’s wife after the brother dies? I’ve never been able to understand this custom, especially if the dead brother is the older one, because in South India. the wife of the older brother’s wife is supposed to be like one’s mother. (This is not true of the wife of a younger brother.) So this custom always set off strong reactions of “incest” to me (the same way the cousin marriage custom of the south sets off similar reactions in North Indians, I suppose). But anyway, because this custom does exist in the North, and I think the Shashi character is Amitabh’s older brother, yes? The whole action of Amitabh marrying Jaya in those circumstances takes on a whole new meaning. There is a much stronger and greater responsibility thrust on Amitabh by this marriage than would be the case if he just married some random girl who is unwed and pregnant. To break a marriage undertaken under such circumstances is much, much more difficult than an ordinary marriage. Some North Indians here can correct me if I am wrong, but I think I’ve got this interpretation correct. Now my question is, why have I never seen any allusion to this custom, to explain why Amitabh marries Jaya in the first place here? I don’t know, I think it requires a real rethinking of all the discussions of this film that I’ve seen so far. But the focus of discussion was always on how the on screen relationships mirror the off screen ones.

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    • Strangely enough, this movie is where I first ran across the brother-marrying-widow trope. As in, watching it with a friend, they used this as an example of it.

      This is the purest expression of where that tradition came from, the way it is played out. We see how there is this built in familiarity between Jaya and Amitabh based on their shared affection for Shashi when he was alive, and Amitabh’s sort of flirtatious behavior as a compliment paid to Shashi’s “wife”. After Shashi’s death, there is a wonderful moment where Jaya meets Amitabh as he gets off the plane for the funeral and they are immediately tied together by shared grief. And then finally, of course, there is her child-to-be which will tie them together that much further, and which has no place in the world unless Amitabh claims it. So, all valid reasons for the tradition of widow marriage to the brother to be a good thing. Already familiar with each other, sharing grief that will bond them further, and giving any children a legitimate place in the world and the family.

      The film is a little unclear as to if Shashi or Amitabh is the older brother, or even what kind of “brothers” they are. That is, you could potentially read the film as two very close friends who grew up together. There is no larger family for them ever introduced or referred to, just shared childhood hijinks. Which also goes back to Amitabh marrying Jaya. She and her child get a name, and Amitabh gets his only family back.

      Maybe that’s why it isn’t brought up as much? It’s an example of that tradition, yes, but it is done so well and so naturally that it doesn’t feel like “tradition” it just feels like the unusual situation these people have found themselves in. Jaya has no family, Amitabh has no family, the best solution for both of them is to come together and form a new family.

      On Sun, Mar 4, 2018 at 8:15 AM, dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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      • Amitabh does spell it out for Jaya over their first meeting: Shashi is older by a year and a half. Also, I’ve only ever seen the custom carried out among Punjabis (disclaimer: I’m Punjabi) when the elder brother dies and the younger one is single. I understand the intent to be a lot less noble than making sure they can each be family to the other and give the children their place. It comes more from a place of – getting a daughter/sister married is such a chore in the first place, we don’t want to have to do it again, and we definitely don’t want her back in our house. We threw you guys a lavish party and gave you furniture and clothing and gold. As far as we’re concerned, it’s your responsibility to provide for her now. AND give her the social status that comes with being married, since that was the trade we essentially carried out.

        I’ve seen major fights erupt over this between the two sets of parents right at the funeral (“the younger brother already has someone picked”, “the younger brother is more educated and wants an english speaking wife” etc). I’m not entirely convinced this is a good thing for anyone involved. The widow is treated as cattle and pronounced as unwanted and a burden RIGHT WHEN she’s also dealing with a major loss. The younger brother is robbed of his autonomy and agency. I understand Indian society at the time made it so hard to be parents/siblings to single women (let alone single women with kids from a previous marriage, to say nothing of single pregnant women from a marriage that never got a chance to happen), so expensive to get them married, and so MANDATORY for the bride’s family to spend their life’s savings on the dowry and the gold that anything less would be considered “disrespectful”, that the thought of doing it all again would make people say and do crazy things. But I still wish they’d instead spare a thought for what SHE wanted, or remotely considered the possibility that she might not have wanted another marriage in the first place.

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      • Amitabh does spell it out for Jaya over their first meeting: Shashi is older by a year and a half. Also, I’ve only ever seen the custom carried out among Punjabis (disclaimer: I’m Punjabi) when the elder brother dies and the younger one is single. I understand the intent to be a lot less noble than making sure they can each be family to the other and give the children their place. It comes more from a place of – getting a daughter/sister married is such a chore in the first place, we don’t want to have to do it again, and we definitely don’t want her back in our house. We threw you guys a lavish party and gave you furniture and clothing and gold. As far as we’re concerned, it’s your responsibility to provide for her now. AND give her the social status that comes with being married, since that was the trade we essentially carried out.

        I’ve seen major fights erupt over this between the two sets of parents right at the funeral (“the younger brother already has someone picked”, “the younger brother is more educated and wants an english speaking wife” etc). I’m not entirely convinced this is a good thing for anyone involved. The widow is treated as cattle and pronounced as unwanted and a burden RIGHT WHEN she’s also dealing with a major loss. The younger brother is robbed of his autonomy and agency. I understand Indian society at the time made it so hard to be parents/siblings to single women (let alone single women with kids from a previous marriage, to say nothing of single pregnant women from a marriage that never got a chance to happen), so expensive to get them married, and so MANDATORY for the bride’s family to spend their life’s savings on the dowry and the gold that anything less would be considered “disrespectful”, that the thought of doing it all again would make people say and do crazy things. But I still wish they’d instead spare a thought for what SHE wanted, or remotely considered the possibility that she might not have wanted another marriage in the first place.

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        • Thank you! Very interesting background. It reminds me, this is how Henry the 8th got his first wife. She was married to Henry’s elder brother as part of an elaborate complicated series of treaties, and when his older brother died, they just married her to him instead. Her family had been promised she would be Queen of England and it didn’t really matter who the husband was, so long as she still had that status.

          Also, have you seen Malli Malli Idi Rani Raju? It’s a Telugu romance and the twist at the end (SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS) is that the hero had the option of marrying his friend to save her from being an unmarried mother, and instead he just took care of her and her daughter financially and emotionally but without any formal marriage ties, kept them both single and able to fall in love with someone else if they wanted.

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          • That’s exactly what it’s like – the marriage was between our family and yours, she’s a daughter in law in YOUR household, and as long as you have another single son who can serve the purpose she’s going to keep that status.

            I haven’t watched that movie and in general, shy away from subtitled movies from India cos the subs are usually TERRIBLE. Do you understand Telugu? If not, I’ll definitely try to watch it. Sounds like a movie I’d love.

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          • I don’t understand anything 😦 I’m really terrible with languages, I can barely get by in Hindi films without subtitles but even that is a struggle, and I have no knowledge of any other languages.

            The Malli Malli movie is mostly a ridiculous over the top romance, but it does think outside the box in terms of if people really “have” to get married if they don’t want to.

            Oh and by the way, thank you for commenting! I forgot to say that, I usually like to thank and welcome first time commentators. So thank you! And Welcome!

            On Sun, Mar 25, 2018 at 7:49 PM, dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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  3. Thank you for this! I just watched Silsila a couple of months ago and I definitely enjoyed it more than I thought I would, since I already had a basic idea of the plot and how it would end. I have to say, though, Sanjeev and Jaya really stole the movie out from Amitabh and Rekha. Yash Chopra definitely gave them some great moments, which they just ran with as actors! I kind of wanted them to leave their selfish spouses at the end and get together!

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  4. I rewatched the movie today and the ending (once again) made no sense to me. I hear what you’re saying, but I didn’t get that from the Amit character’s behavior AT ALL. The first time I watched it, I was stunned to learn that Jaya was pregnant: “You mean this whole time he was having an affair with Rekha AND sleeping with Jaya?!”

    In all other respects, their relationship seemed very platonic. They hardly touch each other, there are no sweet nothings shown, and it was easy for me to assume they slept in different bedrooms even though the movie didn’t show that. It’s clear he doesn’t want to be out and about with her. The only time he takes her out is when the company includes Rekha.

    He spends entire nights out while she is alone at home. I didn’t see them fall into a rhythm like plenty of other much married people do. And I have no clue what Rekha’s marriage was like apart from what was shown. It did involve sleeping in the same bed and likely having sex, as the movie suggests in one of the scenes. But both sets of couples could easily be mistaken for platonic friends by people meeting them for the first time at a party. I honestly didn’t see the intimacy-built-into-marriage thing you mentioned in your post. I thought the ending was a cop out cos Yash Chopra figured the movie would flop with any other ending.

    The Rang Barse song – to your point – has always evoked outrage in me. My mom too. My dad looks a little like Amitabh Bachchan so by the time the song is over, she’s usually mad at him. (My dad.)

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    • Came back to say Amitabh and Jaya seem to come from two different schools of thought.

      To Jaya, marriage is about two people carrying out their responsibilities. (That is SUCH a 1980’s-Indian way of looking at it!). She “loves” Amitabh cos he followed through on his “kartavya” – a word she mentions twice. To her, it was his DUTY to marry her after his brother died. He delivered on that, and that was enough for her. She in turn probably had cold/devoid of feeling/just plain weird sex with him, likely by way of carrying out her responsibility. Even though he didn’t take her along to his big night, didn’t thank her in his speech, clearly invited Rekha, and even otherwise paraded around an intimacy with her that he clearly didn’t share with Jaya.

      To Amitabh, marriage is likely about love and passion. He fell into the marriage = responsibility trap because that’s likely what he’d seen and heard growing up, but that wasn’t what came to him naturally. (I’m of the opinion it doesn’t come to anyone naturally; some people are just more conditioned into the idea than others.)

      Last night, I happened to mention to my parents that I was very happy my brother and his wife are having such a good time traveling/going to music festivals/having so much fun. Their response: “Marriage is not about fun-shun. Responsibility nibhani bhi aani chahiye.” (Translation in case anyone needs it: you should also know how to carry out your responsibilities). It’s such a binary way of looking at it, and that’s why I called them two schools of thought. Cos elsewhere in the world I’ve seen people have no problem thinking of marriage as a partnership that involves having fun together and carrying out responsibilities jointly.

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      • Shoot, I cannot remember what movie I just reviewed that dealt with this! Maybe Munthirivallikal Thalirkkumbol? Malayalam movie with the revolutionary idea of a husband having an affair with and showing affection towards his wife. !!!! Lots of talk about how marriage can be about closeness and love and happiness and so on, with the assumption that it normally WOULDN’T be about those things.

        What I find really interesting is when you see the other side, the love romance movies that dig into how getting married does actually change things, you can’t say that a love marriage is always happy and perfect, just as you can’t say that a duty marriage is always about duty and never love.

        Anyway, in Jaya and Amitabh’s case in this movie, I think you got it exactly. He couldn’t really be all in on this marriage until he felt that love and passion for Jaya, and it took him working through his feelings for Rekha before he could get there with her. And I think you are right about Jaya too, although I would add that it seems reasonable that after her loss of Shashi, she would run from the passionate kind of love and be happy with the safe choice that could not let her down.

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      • Last one, I promise! When Amitabh’s friend Kuldeep says they’ve got family etc at home who won’t appreciate him and Rekha showing up together, Amitabh says “Fine so we won’t come together…I’ll show up as your friend and she as your wife’s”. Rekha looks at him, stunned, like what just happened?! She also asks him a minute later if there’s now a “wall of thinking” keeping him away from his earlier decision.

        To me, it appears as if this is really about Amitabh figuring out how much he wants to trade social capital for. He could have told Jaya, ” Sorry, I’m in love with someone else, but I’ll support you in every other way I can..” instead of marrying her. He could have told Kuldeep, “Sorry, she just left her home and her husband to be with me…we understand your family won’t be accepting of this, so maybe it’s best we don’t visit at all..” and checked into a hotel.

        That also seems to be his first time realizing there’s a social cost to infidelity, divorce, etc. and it’s not as if the rest of his life is going to be the same, only with a different woman around this time. People will take sides, he’ll lose some friends, some respect in society – and the minute he hears that for the first time from Kuldeep, his response is to say oh let’s pretend we’re not together. If I were Rekha, this moment would make it to MTV’s One Tight Slap. (Example: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5ijB0aFuGU)

        The few minutes that follow are scripted so as to allow him to go all in while also saving face. He was never going to have the balls to go out and about with Rekha and show his face in society ANYWAY.

        Meanwhile at the kirtan, Kuldeep’s mom tells Rekha – “You only become a complete woman (in terms of status) as a mother. Without a child you’re only half a woman. The next time you step into this house, make sure you’ve got your husband by your side and your child in your lap.” So to quality my earlier equation, marriage = responsibility as input, status as output.

        Like my parents say, where’s the room in all of this for “fun-shun”?!

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        • Brilliant interpretation! I think you are exactly right. And it is the same conflict Yashji explored more with Amitabh in Kabhi Kabhi. He wanted the perfect college love in that movie, but he wasn’t willing to go against her parents and society to make it work. And later he wanted all the benefits of a socially acceptable marriage without giving his wife any true love. Which, now that I think about it, is why he was so unhappy to learn his wife wasn’t “perfect” after all, he was supposed to get a perfect socially acceptable family out of all of this, and without that he felt like his sacrifice of love was pointless.

          On Sun, Mar 25, 2018 at 8:39 PM, dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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          • That is SPOT ON about Kabhi Kabhi! Thanks for helping me decode why I’ve never liked Amitabh. My idea of him is too tied up with the entitled/narcissistic/manchild characters he played as hero.

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          • Kabhi Kabhi and Silsila really just serve to confirm, once again, that Shashi Kapoor is the greatest man ever and the best possible husband and Amitabh is only a far far second choice.

            On Sun, Mar 25, 2018 at 8:56 PM, dontcallitbollywood wrote:

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    • It’s been a while since I watched the movie, so maybe I am misremembering, but I remember at least one conversation taking place while they casually moved around a shared bedroom, and I know they were cleaning up together in the same bathroom after Rang Barse.

      But you are right, they do seem like platonic friends compared to other couples. On the other hand, I never felt like Amitabh and Rekha had anything real either, it felt like a passion that would burn out in no time.

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