This is a very round about post. I asked my friend (who requested that I link back to her instagram as her credit for always helping with these posts, so here it is) what I should do for my Friday post, as I ask her every Friday. And her response was “Travel!” because she is going out of town today. Only there aren’t really a lot of super great travel photos, so I ended up narrowing it down to “travel on motorcycles”.
Once again, you get to pick between photos. But I’m just going to have them competing against themselves, because otherwise it would be another Shahrukh landslide.
Also once again, I am not going to make you wait for the good stuff, putting dessert first. Shahrukh on motorcycles. Do you prefer:
Shahrukh as a manly older army guy.
Shahrukh as little baby
Shahrukh as movie star (hey! I should have used this for my tuxedo post!)
And Shahrukh as just straight up sexy bad boy
And finally, Shahrukh being very relaxed and phallic about it all.
Okay, catch your breath, fan yourself off, let’s move on.
Varun Dhawan, not so much. I mean, he’s fine, but he’s a little too much of a good little boy to really pull off the bike look. But still, competing against himself only, do you prefer:
Varun starring off into the middle distance
Varun sensitive in a brown jacket
Varun cool hair and sunglasses
And then there’s Akshay. DEFINITELY man enough for a motorcycle. Man enough for a motorcycle and then some.
Is he more man with a motorcycle with Sonakshi Sinha on top.
Or more with Taapsee Pannu?
Or is the most manly thing to just sort of stroll around and point towards motorcycles near him?
Or is pulling off a white bike with gold highlights best of all? Maybe!
Next choice! John Abraham. Which of these is best?
The clearly fake one?
The high concept photo shoot for suits?
The simple one that shows off the line of his thighs?
Or the candid one with sunglasses?
How about going down south? Dulquer!
Dulquer on motorcycle with helmet and big grin
Dulquer off motorcycle and without shirt
Dulquer, motorcycle, beard, mundi (munda?)
I really want to do Nivin next, but turns out he looks terrible on a motorcycle. So instead, Madhavan!!!
Madhavan grown man with beard and maturity on motorcycle.
Madhavan with beard, motorcycle, maturity, no shirt
Or, Madhavan bearded and older but NOT mature, with cigarette
And finally, Classic Madhavan
There was a complaint last time, so yes yes, I am not going to forget Prabhas!
Prabhas good boy style
Prabhas bad boy style
Prabhas rockstar style
Prabhas gangster style (same as bad boy, but now with a gun)
And finally, to round this all out, Amitabh! The Baap ki Bikes (did I use that slang right?)
Disturbingly old Amitabh
Disturbingly young Amitabh
Or, of course, Sholay Amitabh
Okay, you ready for my picks? Which you can dispute in the comments when placing your own?
Manly older army guy Shahrukh
Varun in a brown jacket
Akshay with Sonakshi (she’s just so happy!)
Clearly fake John Abraham (points for originality!)
Dulquer no shirt (turns out I’m shallow)
Mature Madhavan (love the direct gaze!)
Gangster Prabhas
And obviously, Sholay Amitabh
dontcallitbollywood 
I’m in a rush to go somewhere, so I can’t hunt up the pics for you right now, but I can’t believe that you didn’t include:
1. John Abraham on a bike from Dhoom (the first one)
2. Hrithik on bikes
3. Salman on bikes
Too many to choose from for numbers 2 and 3, so if you wanted pics of people competing against themselves, there would be lots of choice.
For Prabhas, somehow, I kept expecting a pic of Bahubali on a bike. (I think there’s one “on the set” pic like this).
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It was SO BUSY at work today! So i just put up 6 or so guys and called it a day, instead of finding the best possible of all the guys in the world.
I did look for that Dhoom picture, and no luck! The best I could find was a shot that just showed his head and the handlebars.
On Fri, Sep 8, 2017 at 5:22 PM, dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Can I just say I dislike all of the ones with sunglasses? I like to see their eyes!
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You sound like my father. There was a while there I had a habit of hiding my eyes behind my hair.
On Fri, Sep 8, 2017 at 6:43 PM, dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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SRK as ‘straight up sexy bad boy’ is all anyone needs to know about boys & bikes. In my opinion. No others need apply. Except the other SRKs.
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really? No love for army guy or phallic version?
On Fri, Sep 8, 2017 at 9:32 PM, dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Well..Samar on the Enfield was my first ever sighting of SRK so he always has a place in my heart~but i thot we were limited to just one. And phallic version is definitely a great look!
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It’s true, just one, I was just surprised it wasn’t that one!
On Sat, Sep 9, 2017 at 7:34 AM, dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Old school . . . .
https://wing-auctions.c.yimg.jp/sim?furl=auctions.c.yimg.jp/images.auctions.yahoo.co.jp/image/dr170/auc0303/users/8/2/4/0/transmitter2050-img600x416-1459505197ycp8op20721.jpg&dc=1&sr.fs=20000
http://hanabi.autoweek.com/sites/default/files/styles/gen-932-524/public/Marlon-Brando.jpg?itok=rncmgANU
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https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwj73dy6mpfWAhVDOCYKHX6dAUkQjRwIBw&url=https%3A%2F%2Fauctions.yahoo.co.jp%2Fseller%2Ftransmitter2050&psig=AFQjCNFELmtiuYcaUWr-pBXRtPjUsPeGig&ust=1505015313820563
https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwjCvfngmpfWAhUDSSYKHRRvDW0QjRwIBw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fautoweek.com%2Farticle%2Fcar-life%2Fbe-wild-one-bid-marlon-brandos-motorcycle&psig=AFQjCNGqWvRzBtAliFdC1TFRmVmrW-sA-A&ust=1505015740423659
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nevermind . . . I can’t get the links to work.
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saw some of them… nice!
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Oh, Brando’s Harley was auctioned for 256,000 $…if the one who got this beauty might also “cruise around the city” at 3 am? Just picture it…*sigh*
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Shahrukh as a manly older army guy: With those decorations, you get a chauffeured car! Also, older army guy riding a bike in his fatigues looks wrong because you immediately think what is so wrong with his career that he doesn’t have a car (Sorry I’m being a realist!) Love the bike though. It looks like a classic model, the kinds young academy officers from good families tend to have.
Shahrukh as little baby: ICONIC! Everything about it makes sense. Is cool. Is hot. Is trendy. Again, cool bike!
Shahrukh as movie star: What the hell? He looks like his inseam is riding up which it might be. Hate the bike!
Shahrukh as just straight up sexy bad boy: Cool. Everything makes sense. I can totally see him with a gang of urbane bikers somewhere in the hills. You meet him at a dhaba that is famed for its chai. Things happen. (Let me save this picture for a future fanfic) Love the bike too.
Shahrukh being very relaxed and phallic about it all: This is what mid-life crisis looks like in India.
Varun starring off into the middle distance: His face looks right almost like he has a soul.
Varun sensitive in a brown jacket: The forced furrowed brow– that’s an asshole’s trademark expression. Beau’s super-vain bodybuilder older brother makes the same face in all his gym bathroom selfies and he is the fakest, vainest guy i know. Now i hate Varun Dhawan even more!
The jacket-shirt combo is amazing. The bike looks like it should have been showed off more.
Varun cool hair and sunglasses: Car in the background makes this seem like someone way cooler (like Maddy from further down the list) brought the bike and Varun just took pics on it for his instagram!
Akshay on motorcycle with Sonakshi Sinha on top: First of all, I hate this color on a Bullet. Bullet is a classic. Why did they have to go and paint it this awful color? Akshay alone on this bike would have made it more bearable but only just.
With Taapsee Pannu: See how he’s not leaning forward like more “serious” powerbikers do? That shows this man knows his way around a bike. Inspires confidence. Also, showcases his thighs! LOVE! Taapsee looks comfortable which is very difficult to do on bikes like these.
The ad kinda proves the point I’m trying to make about the previous pic– These hondas are the MOST comfortable for the passenger riding with you.
White bike with gold highlights: Usually I’d hate such a bike but I loved it in OMG! Made sense since Akshay as Krishna needed to be larger than life and cool. And Krishna WAS cool!
Jon lifting the bike: NOT Fake! That’s a classic model with a classic number!
Photo shoot for suits: Yuck! Dressy pants and bikes-ouch!
Jon on the Aprilia: The only guy who ever made sense to me on a big power bike like that ever is Valentino Rossi. With his goofy face! Big power bike and rider is supposed to be the same thing as big muscular racehorse and jockey and a chunky jockey would look awful on a racehorse in a race.
Candid one with sunglasses: At home, with chappals on, relaxing with a bike you actually take out for a spin. See how he’s touching it? Awww!
Dulquer on motorcycle with helmet and big grin: Yes!!! That helmet alone screams “I’ve been doing this for a long time and this isn’t just for a photoshoot”
Dulquer off motorcycle and without shirt: again “I know my way around bikes” and equally suggestive things pop into your head!
Dulquer, motorcycle, beard: Classic bike, classic helmet, classic lungi, classic shirt, classic watch, classic hair, beard– everything about this picture says “I was born in a rich family and my grandpa was doing this same cool look when he was my age too!
Madhavan grown man with beard and maturity on motorcycle: the only guy who could pull this look off on this bike:
Madhavan with beard, motorcycle, maturity, no shirt: guys fixing bikes– what woman doesn’t find that appealing?? Plus see how he’s a little chunky down the middle? HOT!! That’s a hot look on 35+ guys. Not ripped abs. those look like steroids and vanity. This is a REAL MAN!! Thank you very much!
Madhavan bearded and older: He’s Tamil. He was BORN mature. Let him have his rebellious phase please! And oh that classic bike!
Classic Madhavan: He’s on a Hero Honda. The national bike of India. People would argue that’s Bajaj but Bajaj was the national bike of India for the guys who were teens/young adults in the 80s maybe!
Prabhas good boy style: Nope! You don’t wear a dress shirt and khakhi trousers and lounge shoes on a bike like this. And with no helmet. totally out of place.
Prabhas bad boy style: My dad had this bike!! Overall amazing bike. If i saw this guy on the street, I’d look twice or more!
Prabhas rockstar style: Channeling Jon Abraham and it’s NOT working!
Prabhas gangster style: It’s from the same film and sequence as Prabhas bad boy style. You get the full view of the bike and you see how proportionate Prabhas looks on it.
Disturbingly old Amitabh: NOPE!
Disturbingly young Amitabh: I was singing this song in my head the moment i saw this pic! The whole look is iconic.
Sholay Amitabh: Iconic
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What did Varun Dhawan ever do to you??? so mean!!!
For Maddy, the guys fixing bikes photo is from his newest film Vikram-Vedha. the romance is really not the point, but it’s also super hot. He is married to an ambitious mouthy lawyer and they are constantly having fights that turn into sex. Don’t know if you would like the rest of the film, but the romance is DEFINITELY in your wheelhouse.
And I assume you know about/have seen Saala Khadoos? that photo of him with the bike, that’s like the WORST he looks in the whole movie. SO GOOD.
the last Dulquer shot, you totally got the character! He’s a communist guy from a big family, he and his Dad fight but understand each other, and both wear lungis all day every day, formal or informal depending on the occasion.
Never thought about it, but motorcycles are yet another thing Prabhas should use to highlight his height! Along with co-starring with Anushka Shetty and wearing tailored slim line shirts.
On Sat, Sep 9, 2017 at 12:05 AM, dontcallitbollywood wrote:
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Varun Dhawan is vain, dumb, talentless, big-mouth, showpony who isn’t even good-looking. And he is being thrown in our faces 24/7 through paid promotions. That’s why I hate him.
And I think Prabhas should maybe try the Maddy look. His weightloss for Saaho has made his face look lifeless. Either he goes back to Darling/Rebel look/weight or goes all the way down to Bujjugadu weight and look which really paved the way for the well-dressed Mirchi look. His best and most natural look is the Mirchi rain fight scene look including the slightly questionable shirt. He’s not stylish in real life and when they put him in very stylish clothes, he can’t pull it off with confidence for too long.
thanks for the maddy recommendation!!
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I think I can save you the bother of Vikram Vedha. Really good police drama type thing, but the whole romance is basically in this one song:
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Nooooo… I want my two and a half hours worth of ogling!!!!
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But it’s a two hero film! although, wait, you liked Mahesh Manjrekar, you may like the other guy too.
Also, if you want your two and half hours of ogling, you’ve GOT to check out Saala Khadoos/Irudhi Suttru. Bearded angry feminist boxing coach Maddy is the best Maddy. And the heroine is great too. And then you can tell me what the ending means.
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I watched a bit of Saala Khadoos but I wasn’t paying too much attention because I was sleepy and the story wasn’t engaging enough. I’d rewatch expressly for the purpose of ogling now. 😂
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And my purpose in life is fulfilled. If I can make one person more willing/able to ogle one Indian actor, then I have succeeded.
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It’s the revolution women across the world NEED
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Thank you! Finally someone has expressed my opinon of the vastly over-rated Varun whatever his last name is.
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I’m with you on the hate for Varun dhawan and Siddharth Malhotra 😀
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I adore bikes (motocycles)…it’s always a high when I meet bikers riding in a throng…and I seldom pass a bike without taking a close look…to the engine!
Okay, for ShahRukh, I make an exception…if ever I had to choose one of his biker-scenes, it would be this one, because everything is just perfect: the engine, the man, the landscape, the voice, the words…on big screen simply overwhelming:
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I knew what that would be even before I clicked the link!
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*chuckle*
basically I like all the ShahRukh-bike-movie-scenes…it’s only if I absolutely have to focus on o n e 🙂
I’m less a fan of the man-with-bike posing ones…bikes are for mouvement 🙂
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No, I have to be honest…I have to give due credit to the young ShahRukh, too…and it won’t be a suprise that I would choose his intro in Deewana (which I won’t post here, because I don’t like the music)…I watch it without sound and skip the whole middle-part (2.30-5.30)…I watch the rest because of the boys jumping to greet the airplane (RDB copied it later 😉 ) and one gets the view of the Bandstand-Mannat-LandsEnd area of 1991 🙂
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