TGIF: Kingly Men

Happy Friday!  Last week I did traditional clothes, and did you notice I skipped Jodha-Akbar?  That was on purpose!  I had this in mind already, our kingly men.

We can have all sorts of historical discussions about this ruler or that ruler.  But I think we should remember the most important consideration, Who Was The Hottest King?


First, a variety of Akbar and Hrithik options.  This top is  a bit blousy, but I like how foofy his hair looks.

Image result for akbar hrithik

Now see, all this embroidery is nice, but we can’t see his hair under the hat!

Image result for akbar hrithik

This might be the best overall look.

Image result for akbar hrithik

Or, of course, this:

Image result for akbar hrithik


Akbar was the greatest king in India, but he has a historical competitor, Asoka.  And Hrithik has a competitor in the “hottest King” stakes, Shahrukh.

Now, feel free to disagree with me, but I find Shahrukh‘s long Asoka hair strangely similar to the stuff I pull out when I snake my shower drain.

Image result for asoka shahrukh

See, the short hair in-disguise-as-a-peasant look is just so much better for him!

Image result for asoka shahrukh

Although I might allow for this sort of hybrid affect, with the modern bangs and kind of mullet long hair in back.

Image result for asoka shahrukh


Speaking of hair, what’s our feeling about Ranveer in Bajirao?  Great performance, sure, but how sexy is it?  This sort of works for me, partly because of his intense look, and partly because his head stubble is a little more noticeable. (and, of course, strangely similar to a wolf puppy)

Image result for bajirao mastani

But then there’s this, with the hat and all, and I just don’t know.  Although his expression is still great.

Image result for bajirao mastani

I think I might like him best in full noble warrior-who’s-seen-things mode.

Image result for bajirao mastani


Obviously, we have to old-school with this, and throw in a Prince Salim option.  Sure, Mughal-E-Azam is the greatest historical in film history, but does that necessarily mean that Dilip Sahib was the hottest possible ruler?  On the other hand, he is pretty cute:

Image result for dilip kumar mughal e azam

And romantic:

Image result for dilip kumar mughal e azam


Veer is only sort of historical.  But I feel we should at least give the option of more of a guerrilla fighter type of king.  Although, again, it is a wig with that distinctive shower drain feel to it.

Image result for salman veer

Possibly better in western wear:

Image result for salman veer

And finally, it is a Salman movie after all, let’s let him show off his most famous feature:

Image result for salman veer


Now, there is one king that it occurs to me I have been missing.  He is clearly the best and hottest historical king, but which of these three options most clearly evoke him?

Image result for salman khan elvis


Image result for hrithik elvis


Oh and finally, as always, Garam-Dharam!  From Razia Sultan, which is kind of historical.

Image result for dharmendra razia sultan

20 thoughts on “TGIF: Kingly Men

  1. Oh no. I don’t find any of these looks hot 😦 Except Salman in western wear.
    Looking forward to this series again next Friday.
    I wonder what the theme will be…gangster? Hot dads? That sounds creepy but I mean the likes of SRK in KKHH or Salman in Jab Pyar Kisse Se Hota Hai


  2. Of that selection I reckon Hrithik is the hottest (sorry SRK!). Salman does not do long hair well at all.

    I would be fascinated to know how they make those kingly Bajirao hats.


    • I make costumes for my friend sometimes, and it is always amazing to me how lazy you can be with theater stuff versus “real” close. Wouldn’t be surprised if the Bajirao hat is just glue gun and staples.

      Although, this is Bhansali, he does like to over think. It’s possible he spent 100s of crores on research and development and dozens of individual Bajirao hats. If I ever break into Ranveer’s house, along with his Dabboo calendars I will also try to grab some hats for us to analyze. but first the calendar.


  3. Hrithik as Akbar is the reason I watch Hindi films now…sigh. But how about the real royal hero, one of my other favorites, Saif Ali Khan. I couldn’t find an image of him in the cameo in Khoobsurat, but here’s one of my favorite looks:


  4. Ha, that’s so funny! I meant to share this photo. By the way, James and Cipres are my favorite current pairs skaters and they’re awesome!


    • But it’s so ugly! Couldn’t we write in a lengthy scene in which a priestess tells our hero that he will only succeed if he bathes his head in oils and perfumes every night for 20 minutes? And also she gives him a home made brush and makes him swear to use it a hundred times before each fight?

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Pingback: 2017 DCIB Awards for DCIB Posts!!!! Best TGIF | dontcallitbollywood

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