UPDATE: I just want to clarify, this is not an article that gives a full overview of the situation, or that tries terribly hard to address alternative perspectives. It’s just trying to explain my perspective on it. So, if you already dislike Priyanka and are looking for a better way to articulate your argument, READ ON. Or, if you know someone who dislikes her and you can’t understand why, READ ON. But, if you like her, DON’T BOTHER. I’m not going to give you any new information, or an argument that will convince you. And if you know nothing about her past or personal life, DON’T BOTHER, I assume you have some basic background and I don’t include a lot of details. It really is an article that is just about why I, personally, dislike her. And unless you also dislike her, or know someone who does and want to understand them, it probably won’t make sense or interest you.
UPDATE 2: Okay, apparently UPDATE 1 didn’t work, and there are all sorts of people reading this who very much do not agree with it. I have learned my lesson! I will keep my biased personal opinions for my living room, not the internet!
I’ve left the comments up, because a lot of people made really good points. If you read the article yesterday and have something else to say, feel free to comment. And if you are curious about my other writing, which is much much more boring (mostly box office analysis, birthday posts, and detailed film summaries), feel free to check out the homepage of the site to see the latest posts.
So remember how I mentioned Shahrukh sexily eating a radish? It occurred to me that this was not the first time he had taken advantage of fruit-and-vegetable based acting techniques. And, as a special Monday morning treat (and a reminder to eat healthier now that the holidays are officially over), here are an assortment of fruit and vegetable SRK moments. Continue reading →
So, Bollywoodhungama.com just posted an analysis of the second weekend Dilwale numbers. They see the limp box office for Dilwale and good word of mouth for Bajirao as a sign that Shahrukh should take a moment and think about doing something a little different, instead of just relying on his star quality to carry the picture, because the audience is obviously tired of the same old thing. I agree with their analysis of the box office numbers and all, but I think they are missing the bigger picture. Maybe Dilwale released when it did BECAUSE he wants to different films, and needed to rush a traditional one out the door first.
So, according to this (thank you Melanie for pointing it out!), Shahrukh just “confirmed” a sequel to Ra.One. I don’t exactly get a confirmation from the quote they use, I get more of a “yes, I am still interested!” from it. Which is still exciting, because I am also interested in a sequel! I loved Ra.One, every big stupid bit of it.
The article goes on to point out the dismal box office profits for Ra.One, to indicate that if this sequel does not happen, it may be for monetary reasons. However, I disagree, I think if it does go through, it is for monetary reasons.
The thing everyone forgets about Ra.One is that the profits weren’t in the box office, they were in everything else. And that Shahrukh owned all the rights, and claimed all the profits. Ra.One was the first Indian film to get a deal with McDonalds happy meals, it had action figures, it had comics, it had a video game, the sale of the TV rights alone practically covered all the production costs.
In this, the season of Star Wars, we must all remember that the money is in the merchandising.
Plot, cast, inexplicable foreign locals-Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham and Dilwale share it all! But they are separated by 14 years, and a different director, and different life points of their stars. So, what changed?
So, Darr, the first time the world sat up and went “Hey! That Shahrukh guy can ACT! And is also cute.” But what does it have to do with Dilwale? Well, for one thing, it is one of Shahrukh’s few Christmas releases (the anniversary falling today). Which is actually kind of important, Christmas (in Indian film practice) is a time for slightly darker films.
So, yesterday I talked about how Shahrukh’s film Trimurti from the 90s echos the themes in Dilwale (plagiarism? An homage? Laziness? Who’s to say?!?!) (it’s laziness). But Trimurti isn’t the only film that explores concepts which are touched on by Dilwale. Going back into the 90s, we find Dushman, another film in which Kajol fights for her sister, triumphs through violence, and then turns to love.
So, the plot of Dilwale can either be seen as a triumphant homage to multiple past films of Shahrukh and Kajol’s careers. Or, it can be seen as part of an industry that is constantly recycling plots and abhors originality. I would argue it is a combination of the two, certainly the essential plot is a result of laziness, but it is still worth while to compare the way it interacts with past performances and films in order to discover how things have changed and how the stay the same.
So, I saw Dilwale last night, and I will have many many thoughts, slowly unspinning from my head, over the next few days. Rather than try to limit them all to one perfect post, I’m going to just go ahead and post as things slowly rise to the top of my consciousness.
The first thing that strikes me is that this movie is meant to be watched in a theater filled with rowdy and licentious SRK fans. Not the ones who appreciate him for his acting abilities and keen business savvy, the other ones. For instance, one of my friends was wearing this subtle, respectful, and tasteful piece of jewelry.
So, if you have watched your fair number of 90s Hindi films, you immediately went “Yes! That guy!” as soon as you saw the picture up there. He’s one of those people that wanders in and out of films, playing the guy who is like-the-hero-but-not-as-good. Friend, rival, enemy, brother, what have you. In, like, Everything!!!
He played Sanjay’s best friend and side-kick in Sadak:
(It is a special challenge as a side-kick to make Sanjay look like a good dancer)
A year later, he was in Khiladi, supporting Akshay:
(Shirtless Akshay presents different challenges. Like, being visible on the screen when he is blinding us with his hotness)
The same year, he was Aamir’s rival in Jo Jeeta Wohi Sikander
(ooo, they are so evil!)
In 1994, he twice bested Shahrukh in a romantic challenge, in both Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa and Anjaam:
(I love this movie, and I really love this song. I don’t care that it makes no sense on any level. Also, did you know this actress married Shekhar Kapur, director of Mr. India and the Cate Blanchette Elizabeth movies?)
So, with this new movie, there’s going to be a lot of comparisons with past SRKajol films and judgments and greatest hits lists and so on. So I thought, why not join the party! Before I’ve even see Dilwale, so my judgement is not yet sullied. And then I realized, picking a #1 all time best SRKajol film is easy, but the 5 (6, now) after that are hard.
#1, of course, is DDLJ. I say that not just because it is my favorite movie of all time, but because, objectively speaking, it is the highest quality film they have been in together, and the most beloved. The script deals with issues ranging from structural feminism to first versus second generation immigrants to marriage as a personal or societal undertaking. Plus, it has Shahrukh’s all time greatest acting moment:
If you don’t remember all the other awesome bits of the film, YRF conveniently put together this remix for the 20 year anniversary:
(I think I like the remix better than the original, don’t hate me!)
And the protests have started! Sort of lackadaisical ones, and in Delhi,so I guess Raj Thackeray’s efforts against SRK in Bombay didn’t take off? Is it like a family tradition now, for Thackeray’s to try to prevent the release of SRKajol films?
I do want to point out that the Dilwale protesters seem to be having a much better time than the Bajirao protesters. See, even protesting it, Dilwale is the better choice!
According to twitter, house full through out India, UAE, and not Egypt because they have to wait until the 30th (poor Egypt). Also, Madhuri wished him luck and Karan congratulated him. This picture SRK posted to twitter himself kind of sums it up:
I mean, there’s always a lot of SRK coverage. Supposedly, Neha Dhupia said in an interview “Only sex and SRK sell”, a quote which instantly became an aphorism. And with the way her career is going, she is probably going to be more famous for that quote than anything else. And thereby prove her point, because it’s the closest she’s ever come to being associated with SRK.
Anyway, on any random day if you turn to Times of India, they will have some kind of SRK slide-show or news story or something, because they know we will click on it. This habit reached it’s nadir/zenith when this article was briefly their top online headline. It works, of course, I not only clicked on that article but discussed it in depth with multiple people, and checked the site obsessively for any follow-up information they might have.
But with a movie coming out, there is this cycle (sycle?) where Shahrukh is giving greater access than usual, which means more to report, and because there is more reporting, people are thinking about him more and more, and are more likely to click on even old stories if they are posted on a homepage.
Which lead to this, an epic 37 page slide-show combining every single slide-show ToI has ever done on AbRam into one, leading off with the recent quotes about him courtesy of the Dilwale publicity express.
So, this article was posted on rediff yesterday, and I avoided it for fear of spoilers, but turns out it was just a bunch of charming quotes from people.
Highlights:
Varun, in the trailer, you are seen doing the Shah Rukh Khan pose. Did you practice?
Varun: Actually, a lot of work went into that pose because we checked a lot of videos. Kriti checked and even Rohit sir checked. He (Shah Rukh Khan) has a lot of fans and you don’t want to get it wrong because they may come and beat me up at home.
So we really practiced it. I still haven’t perfected it obviously. But now I’ve got it, and I’m going to perfect the pose — hopefully.
SRK: I have not perfected it yet. I’m also trying.
Shah Rukh, because of you, Raj Malhotra is an impossible character to replicate. It’s actually difficult for us to propose to a girl because of your characters. Do you think love from 20 years ago is different from what we see now?
SRK: First thing, I’m sorry you’re not getting through to people because of my Raj. But don’t worry, you’ll get there.
And finally,
SRK: …… I want to thank so many of you — in New York, Canada, London, and everywhere — for making sure that Bollywood is being spread all over the world. If it wasn’t for people like you, who are talking about it, holding onto it — good, bad, in a criticizing way or in an appreciative way — I don’t think Bollywood or Indian films would have reached where they’ve reached in the last 10 years. So thank you very much.
Notice how I put the really exciting picture at the top so we would remember why this really matters?
So, currently, the highest Shahrukh movie on the all time gross list for India is number 5. NUMBER 5!!! The shame of it! Ahead of him is PK, Bajrangi Bhaijaan, Bahubali, and Dhoom 3. The whole list is here on wikipedia.
Now, you know what all these films have in common? They are all from the past 5 years. And the film at the top is usually from within the past 2 years. In America, we are used to that, the top grossers are always fairly recent, but in India that wasn’t always the case. Mother India set a box office record in 1957 that stayed in place for 3 years until Mughal-E-Azam surpassed it in 1960. Mughal-E-Azam held the record until Sholay beat it in 1975. Sholay held the record until Hum Aapke Hain Koun came along in 1994. Hum Aapke Hain Koun was toppled quickly by DDLJ in 1995. Then DDLJ lost it’s crown to Kuch Kuch Hota Hai in 1998. That record held until 2001 when it was beaten by both Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham and Gadar: Ek Prem Katha. Gadar held the record until 3 Idiots in 2009, at which point everyone breathed a sigh of release because they could start pretending Gadar never happened (very very problematic messages in that film). And then 3 Idiots held the record for a long time, by a big big margin, until it was finally beaten by Chennai Express in 2013. All Shahrukh fans cheered and celebrated and laughed in the faces of their Aamir-fan friends, or at least that’s what I did. Truly, it was a magical time!
(Shahrukh, take a bow! You earned it!)
And then about 2 months later, Dhoom 3 came out and Aamir was on top again. It stayed up there for a year, until PK came out, and then Aamir had the two top spots. PK is still up there, but Bajrangi Bhaijaan did really well this summer and came close to beating it. And Bahubali, of course, is a huge deal since it is the only non-Hindi film up there (although it was distributed by a Bombay based production house, Dharma, which is very important in terms of overseas awareness and national reach in India).
So, on the micro-level, this just means we all need to buy as many tickets for Dilwale as humanly possible in order to return Shahrukh to his rightful ranking. I don’t care if you are actually seeing Star Wars, you buy your ticket for Dilwale!!!
But on a macro-level, in terms of global trends, economics, and the future of the industry, what does all of this mean and where does it come from?
Okay, back in October sometime, Shahrukh told Times of India: “Jis film mein main aur Kajol hai, ek romantic gaana toh banta hi hai, jis film mein Varun Dhawan ho, ek dancing number toh banta hi hai, Jisme do bhai ho, ek bhaiyo ka gaana bhi banta hi hai, jisme ek khoobsurat heroine ho uska ek aur gaana bhi banta hi hai, aur jab poori family ho toh ek sad gaana bhi banta hi hai. Aur yeh sab ho jaaye toh ek item number bhi banta hi banta hai.”
Very loosely translated, I think he is saying there will be a romantic number for him and Kajol, a dancing number for Varun, a song about brothers, a song about what a pretty heroine there is, a sad number, and an item number.
So, I don’t actually know if I could line them up one by one at this point (is the romantic number “Janam Janam” or “Gerua”? Or is “Gerua” the beautiful one? Or “Janam Janam” the sad one?), but that means 6 songs, right? And so far we have seen only 4? Counting the new one out today?
The only one I am sure we haven’t seen yet is the item number. I haven’t even heard rumors as to who might be the item person! Although if that is why Ajay was visiting Kajol in Bulgaria, to be the item boy in her film, I will die of happiness!
Oh! No! Even better! That’s why her mom was visiting in Iceland! Tanuja, returning to her roots!
I did it! I got all the way through the first half of Quantico, watching just in case there is a moment that directly relates to or reveals something about Priyanka’s Indian career. And there is not! But I will be back in March (or whenever), just in case at some point she breaks character, faces the camera, and tells us all about what she really thinks about Kareena Kapoor, what the big fight with Karan Johar was about, and if Ranveer Singh actually hates her as much as he seems to in interviews (and vice versa).
So far, it’s just been a bunch of stuff that those who watch her Indian stuff already know: she is totally willing to do sexy scenes and kisses, her hair is great, she definitely has a new nose, and she has weird chemistry with powerful older men. Oh, and she can’t act (duh).
What I didn’t realize before was how much she is willing to sell out her identity in order to make it overseas. I know that she isn’t the one writing the show or producing it, but she claims she had her choice of scripts and concepts, and this is the one she chose? One that turns a Christmas episode into a New Years one because they didn’t want to deal in anyway with whether a Hindu and a Muslim would celebrate Christmas? One that, last week, dismissed her Om bracelet as a symbol of her personal identity, rather than a sign of her being a practitioner of the 3rd largest religion in the world? One that argues we should avoid violence against the Muslim community because it will turn them against us, not because it is wrong?
In his interview last month with Vogue India, Shahrukh Khan was once again asked why he has never taken a role in an American film, despite being the most popular international star:
“I hope everyone who ‘goes across’ does very well. We’re the biggest filmmaking country in the world and it’s time we were outbound. Yes, if there’s a film with the right role for me, I’ll do it. But I’ll be honest; I’ve never been offered such a film….They should be [afraid of me]. They have to offer me something that doesn’t disrespect my audience of 1.2 billion. I’d never disrespect that,”
Not just Shahrukh, but all of the major stars have given some version of this explanation. Aamir, Salman, Amitabh, they don’t want to work overseas unless it is something that respects them, and respects their audience.
So the biggest thing I learned about Priyanka from my death march through this show is that she doesn’t respect her audience, and she doesn’t seem to respect herself much either.
So, I am a huge huge sucker for a good fanvid, have been for years. Going all the way back to when I was in college and I would take a break from studying to browse around and try to dig up a new SRKajol vid.
After over a decade of loving these things, I think I have figured out 3 categories of fanvids, specific to Indian fandom.
First, there is fanvid that expands on the themes of an existing artwork, for instance this fabulous one from Alina Yuvvraaj:
So, both of those kinds of videos, based on a particular movie or a particular star, you can find in any fandom. Where I think it starts to get unique, is in the next two categories.
First, there are the videos based on a particular mood. Since Indian film follows the Rasa theory, where the goal is to evoke a particular mood at a particular moment, rather than a cohesive mood through out one narrative, a wide variety of films might have particular scenes that flow seamlessly between the borders of their individual movies.
Like this, the moment when you are in love without realizing it yet and happy (from half a dozen different movies with the same moment). By Zizi K again:
Or this, which evokes the specific mood of “young and drunk at a club”, by MRSEMRAAN:
Or this, which has the very specific-to-Indian-film emotion described right there in the title. Women who are sad, and the men who love them from MRSEMRAAN again:
And then finally, there is my favorite category, the totally made up full narratives that go across multiple films and, occasionally, all the way into real life footage. This is really unique to Indian film, because Indian film is uniquely cohesive film to film. The same jodis play the same characters going through the same narrative beats over the over again. And even into real life, in interviews and publicity tours, they interact the same way. And who knows, maybe it is even related to the reincarnation in Hinduism! According to some versions, even Ram and Sita were reborn multiple times and lived out their story over and over.
Anyway, one of my favorites, which seamlessly moves between real life and film. Almost convinces me that Kajol really is eating her heart out, from MissCinemaObsessive:
and then I watch this from lalilly and feel better:
(see, they’re just friends after all!)
Or this one, where she actually does get him, even though he is himself and she is village-Kajol, from Zizi K:
Or this, where it’s not just SRKajol, but SRKajol vs Kajol/Salman and Kajol/Saif, from LUANSU (LUANSU was also the first fanvid maker I found, back in college):
It’s not just SRKajol, I literally screamed with delight when I found this one, hitting up the scandals old school! And using all film footage to tell a real life story, very impressive! From TheMelicrazyy:
And this leads into the bonus subcategory, fake storylines pulling together multiple films, but with stars who never actually acted together! Because actors and their characters are so consistent across films, and all films are so consistant with the kind of scenes they include, you can actually craft a narrative revolving around people who have never been onscreen together (my favorite of these is the Abhishek/Kajol/Rani “Teardrops on My Guitar” that was briefly posted like 6 years ago by Nouf89, and then pulled down. My white whale! If someone out there has it, please send me a copy!). But these are nice too. From rmskch:
(this is so impressive! Remember they have only been onscreen together for less than ten seconds in her friendly appearance in KANK)
And I had never even considered these options, from 3bit89:
(none of these three has ever costarred with each other in anything!)
So, did I do this right? Are there the same number of categories as promised in the post-title? I think so:
Fanvids expanding on one particular film
Fanvids expanding on one particular star
Fanvids combining multiple films with the same mood
Fanvids combining multiple films with the same moods/stars into a narrative
Fanvids combining multiple films with the same moods/stars into a narrative even if the stars never acted opposite each other
The love and violence and love-means-violence is all tied up together in this. My first thought was “so untraditional! What happened to SRKajol, the happpy-go-lucky NRI romance?” But then I remembered that their first movie together was Baazigar, which had this:
Even DDLJ had this:
So really, Kajol shooting him through the heart is just a return to their roots! Or else, she is finally getting revenge on him for heartlessly killing her sister (always bothered me that she wasn’t more angry at him for that) (in Baazigar, not in real life. So far as I know, he has never done anything to Tanisha)
Bonus, it looks like they have almost the same meet-cute as SRK and Divya Bhatya in his very first movie, Deewana:
Nothing more romantic that almost running someone over!
Speaking of Deewana, it also has another reminder that angry unhinged SRK=sexy SRK:
Well, barely on Modi. It’s like a fragment of a quote from an interview where he talked about how he wasn’t going to talk about serious things any more unless it is on a platform specifically for serious things (is he considering a run for office? Let’s start that rumor! Or does he just mean another in depth essay or interview?).
Anyway, here is his quote:
“I think the developmental clause of his governance is fantastic. I am all for modernness and development. And it will be fantastic if he takes it up and makes it for the whole country,”
I think this isn’t quite “damning by faint praise”, but it is pretty close! He likes the developmental clause, but not necessarily anything else. And he is waiting to see if Modi is successful in instituting it for the whole country.
I’m glad I wasn’t the only person whose reaction of the possibility of Alia and Shahrukh co-starring was “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
I am interested in the implication that Karan is losing his pull with the star community, first Shudhi falling about half a dozen times, and now this. Of course, he’s also filming right now with Ranbir and Aish, so he couldn’t have lost all his connections.
dontcallitbollywood 