Podcast Announcement! I Have Successfully Achieved iTunes!

I don’t really know how I did it or if I can replicate it, but in some magical fashion I am now listed as an iTunes podcast.  Phew!  However, there is a monthly time limitation to how many minutes I can load, so the newest one is there, and one of the older ones, but the rest of the podcast library will be added slowly as I gain more minutes month by month.

(the new economy is so stupid, I have to pay every month in order to have the privilege of providing free content to iTunes.  But I am going to resist paying even more in order to have the privilege of providing even more free content!  Also, why a lowercase “i” and a capital “T”?  The new world makes no sense!)

 

Anyway, itunes link!

 

https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/dont-call-it-bollywood/id1262714482

Silly Sunday Speculative Post: Friends! I Can’t Resist Remaking It, Even If It Requires a Massive Rewrite for the Indian Audience

This is such an indulgence of myself, even more than my Golden Girls post.  But I have now finished my dozenth rewatch of the entire run, and I can’t resist.  Partly because I want to add songs and stuff, but also because I really really want to tighten up that plot.  And make Phoebe end up with the guy she is meant to end up with, not Paul Rudd.

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Munna Michael Review (SPOILERS): Made Me Think of the Whole History of Dance Films in India

Well, that was a movie that happened!  So glad I saw it with someone else, by the time we were 5 minutes in, my friend Dina and I were already getting the giggles just by exchanging glances.  But it was kind of neat how it made me think back and really appreciate other better versions. (no spoiler review here) (oh, and I just remembered, I did a post already on the history of dance on film in general, you should read that here)

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TGIF: JHMS Themed, Men in Leather Jackets

One thing that really struck me about the new JHMS trailer released today was how delightfully familiar SRK looked in that leather jacket.  I could do a whole other post on the psychological meaning of leather jackets (Western, motorcycles, slightly forbidden, impractical (SO HOT IN INDIA), helps hide narrow shoulder and expanding waist issues), but we don’t need that, we just know that men in leather jackets=bad boy sexy.

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Full Jab Harry Met Sejal Trailer! No Subtitles, Shahrukh Is Mad At Me Again

Mad at me, but still willing to help, having sensed that my blog views were way way down over the past few days, he provided me with content.  See, even when we are in a fight, he still cares.

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Friday Not-So-Classic: Dil Hai Tumhaare, The Puppet! THE PUPPET!!!! WHY?!?!?!?!?

I did watch a real classic for this week!  Really really!  I watched Andaz and everything!  But I just didn’t feel like writing about it, maybe yesterday’s epic “how to make a film” post exhausted me, maybe something else.  Anyway, that review of a “good” movie will be going up at a some point, probably next Friday.  But in the meantime you will have to make do with this review of a not-so-good movie that my friends badgered me into watching with them on Tuesday night.

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Hindi Film 101: Making a Film Part 2, What Happens While You Are Filming

I put up a random epic post last Monday going over every step of the filmmaking process.  But it seems like as a follow up I should really zero in on what happens during a “schedule”, when you actually start filming.  Oh, and my Hindi Film 101 schedule is now totally blown, you may not get anything at all next week, because this exhausted me.  But it was so interesting I just couldn’t resist!

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Two More Trailers! A Fun Light Rom-Com, and the Opposite!

Datablue pointed out in comments on yesterday’s trailer post that I ignored Arjun Rampal’s Daddy, once again.  And I made a mental note that the next time I had an excuse for a trailer post, I would talk about it.  And then I open up twitter, and poof!  Trailer!  So now I get to combine two very very different films in one post.

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Tuesday Telugu: Ninnu Kori, First Half Great, Second Half Bleak

Maybe it’s because I saw 3 movies in one weekend, but I came out of this one (the last one) feeling really grumpy about the ending.  Like, really really grumpy.  Which is oddly kind of a testament to how invested it managed to make me in the characters (unlike Jagga Jasoos where I didn’t care how it ended, so long as I was freed from the torture)

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New Yash Raj Trailer! Way More Interesting Than the Stupid Star Launch Thing

Thanks to you nice commentators (Niki in particular), I was alerted to this trailer.  And it is really interesting!  Although the new “Kapoor” kid still isn’t blowing me away, the new actress is great.  And then I thought I might as well do a quick look at any other new trailers that our out there, so this also has a song from Baadshaho, Indu Sarkar, and Haseena Parker.

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Box Office Report: Jagga Jasoos Lays an Ostrich Sized Egg

I miss Tubelight!  There are no good Jagga Jasoos puns.  I had to full back on jokes related to actual content.  Blech!  At least if Munna Michael fails next week I have that whole rich thread of Michael Jackson song titles to play with.  Toilet: Ek Prem Katha, that’s going to be just the best week!  (as always, figures courtesy of rentrack by way of bollywoodhungama)

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Monday Malayalam: Thondimuthalum Driksakshiyum Has Three Chains Each With a Different Value

Well that was an interesting movie!  Took me a really really long time to figure it out.  And then in the middle of the night I suddenly sat up and went “Of course!  It’s all about the 3 chains!”

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Hindi Film 101: How a Film Is Made (Inspired by How Jagga Jasoos Did Everything Wrong)

We’ve had a lot of discussion on the Jagga Jasoos post about where things went wrong.  And I think part of the reason we’ve been going around and around is because the production of an Indian film is so very different from the process for a Hollywood film.  And, in addition, the Indian film producers waste a lot less time talking to reporters than Hollywood producers, so it isn’t as easy to get a sense of what really goes into their process.  So I am going to lay it out for you here!

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Final Bahubali Post! What Happened After the Ending?

All over!  So sad!  Except not really, the Index will always be there, I get new comment notifications any time and they pop up on the homescreen too.  So feel free to come back to an old post at any point and add a new thought to it.  I think I have broken it down in a detailed enough way that if there is anything you might possibly want to discuss, there WILL be a specific location for it.  And this is the specific location for if we think all these characters will be able to find a true happy ending.

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Silly Sunday Speculative Post: Persuasion! The Perfect Mature Love Story for Shahrukh, Rani, Saif, Kareena, etc.

Remember way way back when I asked for suggestions/requests for Sunday posts?  Pride and Prejudice (here) and North and South (here) were tops.  And then neither of those posts ended up getting many views, so I sort of veered off that list.  But I don’t have any fresh ideas this week, so I am veering back to it and taking the 3rd one down, Persuasion.

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Want More People To Discover This Fabulous Blog? Here’s How You Can Make That Happen!

Yesterday I put up a post reminding people that if they want, they can pay for content here instead of just getting it for free.  But that’s not actually what I want most.  What I want most is more readers!  Because I like it when people read my work.  But I have no money or time for promoting myself so, if you think more people should be reading this blog, I need your help to make that happen.  And like the paying for content post, I will be putting this up as a monthly reminder, just in case you forget or are a new reader.

Here are 5 simple things you can do to help more people find me:

  • If you participate in any real life Indian/Indian film community (meet-up group, friendly movie night, a Hindi class, a dance class, just being alive and in India), please mention my blog.
  • If you participate in any other online Indian film community, message boards, or other blogs, or podcasts, or youtube channels, please mention and link back to me in your comments.  You know, as appropriate, if it is about a movie I have reviewed or anything like that.  Heck, if it is appropriate in any online community, if an Indian star or movie comes up in a discussion of video games, and I have something about it in my archives, please link back to me in a comment. (in case you think this doesn’t make a difference, a-commentator-who-shall-remain-anonymous posted a Bahubali fanfic on another site and mentioned my blog as helping to inspire it, which gets me about 10 views a week)
  • Re-blog me!  Or re-tweet me or re-post me on Facebook.  Or re-snapchat me or whatever else it is that the kids are into these days.  One of my all time best view days where when someone posted a review to a Sridevi fan group on Facebook.
  • Message anything you think is particularly good directly to the people involved. One of my wonderful commentators tweeted a review directly to a director, and I actually got to have a twitter conversation with him!  Oh right, and he re-tweeted me, which was cool and got me a bunch of new readers.
  • COMMENT!!!  My view count goes up per post with every comment.  You guys are so smart and wonderful, that I know a lot of readers check the comment feed and will go back to a post any time they see a new comment posted.  And, by the way, if you want me to write more posts of a certain kind (Malayalam, Tamil, shot by shot film summaries, etc.), commenting on them is the best way to make that happen.

 

 

And one bonus not simple idea:

A couple of people have mentioned casually that they have shared my work with professional film people they know.  Film reviewers, film students, website editors, whatever.  That’s great and I love that.  When you share it, please also remind them that they can contact me if they would like to use anything I have written, or even something as little as an original thought I have had, in their own work.

 

And on the flip side, please please let me know if you see anyone who has cut and pasted anything I wrote, or even quoted an original thought I have had (something you read and think “this feels like deja vu, didn’t I read this analysis on dontcallitbollywood already?”), without citing where it came from.  I love it when people quote me and cite me, and it makes me feel like the world is horrible when they don’t cite me and take my ideas for themselves.  I’ve already been plagiarized a few times by people who thought it was no big deal to just copy an entire post and put it up as their own, or who took an argument I made and used it as their own without thinking about it.  And that’s kind of the only thing I have of value to offer readers, a promise that every single thought, down to a tossed off comment about how Shahrukh’s hair looks, came from my own brain, not anywhere else.  So if you see it being stolen, please let me know, sometimes there will be someone I can report it to and get it pulled down, or I can just ask nicely if they would please make it go away, or at least cite me as the source.